Cricket World Cup

The Cricket World Cup started last weekend, kicking off with New Zealand against Sri Lanka in Christchurch. Sri Lanka were once a formidable team, indeed they were runners-up in 2007 and 2011. However, they had just completed a tour of New Zealand before the World Cup in which they were royally trounced by the Black Caps, so there was an expectation that they would again crumble.

They did. The Black Caps set a target of 331, and then bowled the Sri Lankans out for 233 in the chase.

Next up for New Zealand were minnows Scotland, and again there was an expectation that the Black Caps would polish them off without difficulty. Bowled out for 142 in 36.2 overs (having recovered from an abysmal start of 1 for 2 (and that a wide) and 12 for 4), the Scots then put up a bit of a fight with the ball. Some of the Black Caps rather threw their wickets away in an attempt to speed up the process, but with the steadying hand of Daniel Vettori they eventually got the required runs with 3 wickets and 25 overs to spare.

And so, to England. This would be the first real opposition, and test, for a Black Caps team that had so far dealt with everything that had come their way recently with relative ease. Over the last 12 months or so, they’ve seen off Sri Lanka, India, Pakistan and the West Indies, as well as dealing to South Africa in a warm-up match a couple of weeks ago, by a massive 134 runs. But England? That’s a different story. This would be a sell-out game, in Wellington’s “Regional Stadium” (brand name having been removed for the duration of the competition, as they aren’t sponsors), so I’d booked tickets early.

We went for an early lunch at Logan Brown, who were putting on a Cricket Special lunch, including cocktails (of which more later).

There’s no parking at the stadium when there’s a major event, as the council close off the whole area to traffic, so we’d parked quite a way away in town. The walk up to the stadium took us a while and we missed the opening overs. No matter, things seemed to be progressing steadily, with England in to bat. As I said, we were expecting a tightly-fought match, so missing a few overs wasn’t a problem. As we arrived there was a roar from the crowd - the first wicket, Ian Bell, had fallen in the fifth over. England were 31 for 1.

Phew! What a scorcher! A loveley day for cricket in Wellington

What happened next? The Black Caps bowled England out for 123 in 33.2 overs.

Let’s just let that sink in for a bit. England scored fewer runs than Scotland managed. Tim Southee took 7 wickets for 33 runs, a record for a world-cup match.

But let’s not get too complacent, eh? I mean, Scotland managed to take 7 wickets while New Zealand chased down the total, and England have some world-class bowlers like Chris Broad and James Anderson. New Zealand came in to bat straight away, due to some weird rules imposed by the ICC (see below).

The first surprise was that one of the usual openers had been replaced by captain Brendon McCullum. The next surprise was that he, with a little help from Martin Guptill at the other end, proceeded to smack the ball around, treating the bowlers with contempt. After a gentle opening over of 9 runs, in the next over they took 18. Following overs maintained this rate, including one memorable over bowled by Finn, from which McCullum hit four consecutive sixes (there was also a four and a single from Guptill, giving 29 from the over).

At this point, we started to do some maths. Could he break the world record for fastest century (set by AB de Villiers just last month in Johannesburg) of 31 balls? It looked possible, but only if Guptill didn't score any more runs. It wasn't the rate at which McCullum was scoring that was the problem, but the fact that they were fast running out of runs to take in the chase! On 72 (from 21 balls) this looked just about doable - he needed 28 more runs, and they were 28 runs behind England's total.

As it turned out, this was a moot point, as he was bowled a few balls later, for 77. He had, however, got the fastest 50 in a world cup match, in 18 balls.

Guptill's poles got knocked down a few balls later, and it was left to the staid, calm hands of Williamson and Taylor to bring the total home (to non-Kiwis: this is a joke).

But wait...there was one final twist. With New Zealand needing just 12 runs to win, the umpires took the bails off, and everyone trooped in for the innings break, to boos resounding around the stadium. Why? the explanation given is that it's in the ICC rulebook, to ensure that all matches are played to the same schedule, in case of rain or other stoppages. Frankly, that's a load of bollocks - it's all to do with the commercial realities of the game. There are certain events that need to take place in the innings break, sponsored by, er, sponsors.  Here's an idea, ICC: if a side doesn't bat their 50 overs, why not take the innings break when they're all out? As it is, the commercial reality for the stadium is that they've lost out on a lot of revenue from eating and drinking fans...money which was doubtless spent in the bars of Courtenay Place and environs instead.

Anyway, this was a serious trouncing for England. As William Woodfull said, "there are two teams out there, only one of them is playing cricket". Only England know what game England thought they were playing. Tiddlywinks, perhaps?

New Zealand have won 3 from 3 now, and still have to face Afghanistan, Australia and Bangladesh. Australia have already whupped England's asses, but they had to play a game of cricket to do so. The match between Australia and New Zealand, in Auckland next weekend, is going to be interesting.