Live Through This

Circa Theatre is back in a limited way whilst we’re still (STILL!) in Covid Alert level 2. Why are we in Level 2? Because the stupid government can’t sort itself out. They’re only now thinking about saliva tests and Covid passports…why weren’t they planning ahead and thinking of this 6 months ago? Idiots. Anyway, that's why I haven't blogged much recently...there's not been much happening.

As always, dinner first. We were on a bit of a tight schedule so we headed for old faves Field & Green, as they’re conveniently close to Circa. As it was, we ended with loads of time to spare as Nicola’s last job of the afternoon didn’t take very long. We parked Hollywood-fashion and were there in plenty of time, to have kingfish and salmon dishes, followed by F&G’s home-made ice cream, which is one of the reasons we go there!

Then across the road in the rain, and into Circa. Tonight’s show, Live Through This, is in fact two separate one-person shows, not really interlinked, offering two different personal points of view of life in Wellington. The first, performed by Jonny Potts, is entitled The Best Show In Town Is At Your Place Every Night. Phew! No wonder they included it in a much shorter-titled duet. Jonny appears, dancing to Ben Lee’s Hard Drive, and then As Time Goes By, before starting off on his monologue/travelogue, in which he remembers the days of the video store on every high street. As the programme notes mention, the video store came and went in one generation…it was both preceded and outlived by its closest relatives, the book store and the record store. He takes us on a tour of Wellington’s suburbs, and describes the nature and character of the video stores to be found in each…except Hataitai. There’s no video store in Hataitai, because they’re all too busy having sex. Whilst some suburbs boast a 24-hour video store, Hataitai has a 24-hour bakery, for all those hungry shaggers. During his journey, he references an unnamed partner, and they end up sharing a cask of wine in a park in Newtown. Ultimately, it’s a wistful, nostalgic look at his mis-spent youth.

The next look at someone’s past is somewhat darker. After the interval, the set has changed from Video Store: Interior to Astrology Shop. The second monologue is a personal history of death: how Jean Sergent, the protagonist, suffered the loss of both her flatmate and cousin, followed by her younger brother, in the same year, when she was in her early twenties; and the effect that these two deaths had on her. In it she provides us with Top Tips For Losing Your Brother, consults various New Age therapists, reads her tarot, and ultimately delivers her own eulogy.

Both of these performances had been at BATS Theatre, as standalone shows, during last year’s Fringe Festival. Does bringing them together add anything to the whole? Possibly, as one may be seen as too lightweight without the counterweight of the darker second half, which would also seem too brooding and downbeat without the preceding half. Get me, practising for Pseud’s Corner here!

The Sister Of Smokey

Once again my Burger Wellington mission was thwarted in my quest for a beef burger. This time, I’d taken a fancy to Little Beer Quarter’s Eat Y’Self Fitter. Sadly, LBQ have decided not to open at lunchtime whilst we’re still at Covid Alert level 2. Bugger. Around the corner from LBQ, however, is perennial favourites Burger Liquor. They’re an establishment that sells both burger and liquor, hence the name (as many full-time burger joints only sell fizzy drinks and shakes).

It’s another chicken burger, entitled The Sister Of Smokey. The Smokey, of course, is one of their standard burgers, and very tasty it is too. The Sister is a chicken alternative to the beef of smokey, but otherwise seems to emulate it in most other details. It’s described like this: Buttermilk fried chicken with prosciutto, pink onion strings, triple cheese sauce and Alabama white sauce in an Arobake sage bun. The Garage Project beer match is Raspberry Cabaret, which is a sour beer. I’m not a big fan of sour beers, so I switched out to BL’s house lager.

It looks like this:

This was a good burger, The chicken thigh was quite thick, so took a bit of biting through, but the burger maintained its integrity despite this, and the crispy onions were tasty too. There could have been more prosciutto – another slice would’ve really given the burger more of an alternate flavour. As it was, it was barely discernible. The main letdown was the fries – shoestring chips that should have been crispy, but turned out to be a bit droopy. I scored this another 7/10.

Boozy Bird

A visit to Zealandia is always a good time to stop off in town and try a burger. On this occasion, I headed to one of my favourite burger haunts in non-WOAP times, Choice Bros. Their wagyu burger is a staple and one of the best burgers generally available in Wellington. They’ve gone with chicken for Burger Wellington.

The Boozy Bird is described thus: IPA-brined fried chicken with housemade bacon jalapeño and yellow cardi jam, pickled radicchio leaf and pickled daikon in a Zaida's black and white sesame seed Turkish bun with thick-cut fries. As Choice Bros is a microbrewery, it would be invidious to ask them to supply a Garage Project beer to match it…instead, one of their own brews, Starman, is the order of the day.

It looks like this:

The chicken breast had been hammered flat and fried. I didn’t detect any particular IPA-ness to the flavour, but it was certainly brined and juicy. One of the issues with using a schnitzel-style chicken as your patty is the burger-to-meat ratio; this was solved by supplying two pieces of chicken, so it was a satisfyingly thick burger. The bun held together well, and the pickled daikon added a bit of crunch and zinginess to the burger. The fries were also good. Overall, a good burger, I scored this a 7/10.

Deli Classic

We’d been up to the Botanic Gardens for a walk and to admire the tulips. They’re only just beginning, so had mercifully escaped the ravages of the storms of the last few days, and a lot of them have yet to bloom. Some years they get absolutely ripped to shreds in the Wellington wind, but so far this year they seem to be OK.

Heading through town, we called Pickle & Pie to see if they had availability under the current 50 person maximum (now thankfully relaxed back to 100 people, which is what the old Covid Level 2 maximum was), and yes! They could. At the oddly-specific time of 1240. We arrive in time and were seated, then both went for the Deli Classic.

Pickle & Pie normally specialise in…anyone?...anyone? Yes, pies, served with pickles. We’ve been there in the past and always been pleased with their fare, each time resolving to go there more often. But with Wellington City Council’s war on cars we hardly ever go into the CBD these days, depriving them (and other venues) of our custom. Ah well. When the CBD is a deserted wasteland I’m sure the council will be happy. Pickle & Pie's burger is what I call a "meat sandwich": Pepper-crusted beef with truffle cheese sauce, mushroom, capsicum and onions in a Dough Bakery brewers grain bun, with gravy, dill pickles and fries. The Garage Project beer match is once again Arvo XPA. I had that, and Nicola had a glass of rosé.

It looks like this: 

This was quite a dry meat sandwich, and easily pickup-able…so I did. There wasn’t much hint of the pepper crust in mine, so it was a little bland. Also the cheese sauce had been sparingly applied – I felt it could have done with more. The pickle was super vinegary, and I didn’t finish it. The chips were good, and the gravy (more of a jus, really) was tasty. It was a very acceptable meat sandwich, but not really anything out of the ordinary. I scored it a 7/10.

Big Yen

Iron Horse, formerly known as Gasworks, has been a Miramar institution for a number of years now. Not noted for fine dining, but they can produce decent pub grub. We’d tried to get there earlier in the week only to find them closed (even though all their media said they were open), so took the precaution of phoning and booking in advance this time. This was also due to trying, and failing once more, to get into Café Polo, who couldn’t accommodate us until 1:30pm because of the 50-person maximum rule currently in force. As Nicola was working this wasn’t feasible.

Iron Horse was practically deserted. There was one other table, and that was it. Still, we ploughed on, and ordered a burger. The Big Yen (did they mean Big Yin?) is described thus: PrimeStar prime Angus beef patty with fried haggis, Whittaker's 72% chocolate and chipotle mole, smoked tomatillo salsa, pickled onions and baconnaise in a Brezelmania bun, with hash bites. The Garage Project beer match is Cereal Milk Stout – not a style of beer I usually go for, but I gave it a try anyway.

It looked like this:

 The unique feature of this burger is the haggis component. Now, haggis is normally quite soft and squishy, but this one had been formed into a patty and then fried to within an inch of its life. The chocolate and chipotle mole was superfluous as it was completely overwhelmed by the salsa. The baconnaise appeared to be simply mayo with bits of bacon in it, rather than a proper mayo made with bacon. Given the chewiness of the haggis and the large quantity of salsa, I didn’t even attempt to pick this burger up, as this would have been a recipe for instant burger collapse. The hash bites were crisp and salty, so a good accompaniment. I felt that although this burger had some good components, they’re tried too hard to stuff everything into it, and the ingredients were unbalanced – way too much salsa, and the haggis overcooked. Not the best, and I scored it a 6/10.

Brekkie For Dinner

…Always A Winner! We drove round the coast to Seatoun at lunchtime, to sample Arcimboldi’s Burger Wellington offering. Arcimboldi is the latest iteration on this site and has been for a number of years, but it has previously hosted Lambanjo and Zico's before that.

See if you can guess what’s in this burger…that’s right! Breakfast ingredients! Yes, there’s a beef patty, but there’s also: Houseground beef patty with Cameron Harrison black pudding steak, bacon, a fried egg, aioli and Shooting Star's Eggplant Relish in a Zaida's challah bun, with handcut fries and BBQ plum sauce. The Garage Project beer match is again Arvo XPA.

It looks like this:

And boy, was it tasty! I thought the egg might defeat the pick-up-ability of the burger but, despite losing a significant quantity of the yolk initially, it held together until the end. The black pudding was a bit friable and had to be contained, but otherwise, this was a very good candidate, and certainly the best I’ve had so far this Burger Wellington. I’m going to score it 9/10. Why not 10? Well, the chips were OK-ish, but lacked crispness and crunch. Everything’s got to be perfect to get a 10.

Under The Sea

What is it with people not being open? Today, we wanted to go to Iron Horse, the pub formerly known as Gasworks, to try their burger for lunch. Better check they’re open, though, so I looked on their website, on Google, and on their facebook page. All said they were open…so, they’d be open, right?

Wrong. They’re shut. Now, the reason we’d selected them is that many of our local Miramar eateries do shut on a Monday, and open up on Tuesday (or Wednesday). But Iron Horse is a 7 days a week venue. Except today. Our choices were limited, so we took a look at what Park Kitchen were offering. It looked OK, so we went round there, and, thankfully, they were open.

My best-laid plan to get back to beef had seriously gone up the spout though, as their burger is a fish-based one. You probably guessed that from the name? The Under The Sea is described thusly: Smoked fish and coconut patty with cucumber, seaweed and ginger salad and wasabi dashi mayonnaise in a Brezelmania coconut bun, with prawn crackers. The Garage Project beer match is Arvo XPA.

It looks like this:

 And it tastes…fishy. Not noticeably smoky, though, and also you wouldn’t know the bun was a coconut one if you hadn’t been told. Nor was there much wasabi in the wasabi mayo. In fact, although it was a nice enough burger, I felt it lacked oomph. None of the promised flavours were big and bold, but rather muted. The most notable things about it were the chewy seaweed, and the prawn crackers. It did the job, but it failed to deliver on its promise. I’m scoring this a 5/10, and I’ll probably continue to avoid PK for the future, as I have been doing so successfully for the last few years – although this has previously been down to their lackadaisical attitude to actually providing a service.