Lake Ohrid

Our Intrepid crew boarded a minibus at 0900 and set off for our second destination, Lake Ohrid. We had to climb a mountain range and start coming down the other side. We stopped halfway for a traditional Macedon treat, fried dough or mekici, with a coffee. The place we stopped at is well-known for it and there were several cars and buses already there, but the operation is pretty slick and we were soon eating them, me with ajvar – a Macedon sauce/condiment made from red peppers, and Nicola had hers with cheese. We have ascertained that when they say cheese, it generally means feta-style. They can’t actually call it feta because EU and Greece and regulations and…and…

We arrived at Hotel Tino around half past midday. Our rooms weren’t ready so we stored our luggage and went for a walk with Danijela along the lake front and a bit of the town, before stopping for lunch at a lakeside taverna where we had a selection of dips including ajvar and makalo, which Danijela described as “like aioli”. <Morgan Freeman> But, it was not like aioli </Morgan Freeman>. It was very garlicky. We sread it on bread. I also had plasica, which are fried whole -  a little too large to eat like whitebait, so I cut the heads and tails off. Nicola tried the local kolbasi (which just means sausage), which was a bratwurst-style thing. 

Local spreads for local people

Plasica, or "little fishes" as they appear on the menu

After lunch we continued our walking exploration of the town. We stopped in at a traditional paper-maker, who demonstrated the paper-making process then printed something on a Gutenberg press. We visited one of the two best shops for buying Lake Ohrid pearls from – two old families are the original makes of LOP and closely guard the secret of their manufacture. Other versions are available. We also stopped in at a little shop to try the world’s finest baklava – according to Danijela, at any rate. It was good – not too sweet, and with different (mostly nut-based) toppings. I’d need to eat all the baklava in the world to come to a definitive conclusion. 

It's ridiculously picturesque

By the time we got back to the hotel we had just half an hour before our next excursion: a boat trip on the lake. This had been brought forward from tomorrow as the weather forecast wasn’t looking too flash for Tuesday. We set out amid a cloud of moths which accompanied us for most of the way, and saw the shoreline from the water, reaching the church of St Jovan, then going over to the other side of the lake where the expensive villas and hotels are. “Why aren’t we staying in these?” we asked. “Because they’re not in the town centre” Danijela told us, which is fair enough, actually. 

One of our group, Carrie, had spotted a wine tasting place on our perambulations and suggested we went there in the evening. We headed up there with Tim and Jackie, and tried four different Macedonian wines, accompanied by a board of cheese and charcuterie which, given the amount we’d already eaten today, sufficed for our dinner. We finished up the tasting with a small glass of rakia, the local firewater, mixed with a bit of brandy, presumably to make it palatable.

Afterwards we walked back to the hotel and had a couple of beers and wine in the bar, where Carrie and Tim set the world to rights.

 

More Skopje

We met as arranged at 0900 in the hotel lobby for our walking tour of the city. Our guide, Zoran, introduced himself, and apologised for the fact that, as a former teacher, he would finish each part of the tour with the words “any questions?”.

We started off in Macedonia Square. He gave us a potted history of Alexander The Great, family and friends, then we set off down Macedonia Street to the new church of Sts Constantine & Helena and the Mother Theresa Memorial House (she was from Skopje, you know). We stopped off at yet more statuary along the way.

The separate Bell Tower

The Church

Mother Teresa House

Interactive statuary

Our next stop was the green market or Zelen Pazar. This does was it says on the tin, it’s full of vegetable stalls. Zoran explained why Macedonian apples were so cheap: Macedonia is part of NATO so can no longer sell them to Russia, their traditional buyer, and the bottom has fallen out of the market. We tasted tomatoes and strawberries – Danijela had enjoined us not to eat too much for breakfast as this was a tasting, as well as a walking, tour. There is also another side to the market that sells “replica” goods – definitely not fake. Again, Zoran explained: fake trainers have the word Adibas on them, replica have the word Adidas. But yeah, not real.

How bazaar

Local spices - cheap!

We the walked past the parliament building, and yet more statuary in a park, representing more events of the country’s past. They’ve had a lot of it, since the days of Al The G, being variously occupied by the Romans, Bulgarians, Byzantines, Bulgarians again, Byzantines again, Serbians, Ottomans, Serbians again, Bulgarians yet once more, and Yugoslavia; before finally gaining independence and autonomy after the break-up of Yugoslavia, in 1991. Phew!

This is my office now

Zoran explained the significance of the Arc de Triomphe-like gate and the prevalence of double-decker buses: the gate was built to celebrate 20 years of independence and is actually hollow, containing rooms that can be hired, often used for occasions such as weddings. The double-decker buses were originally a gift from the UK, to celebrate the fact that Tito had split with Stalin and decided that Yugoslavia would be westward-looking despite being a communist country. European countries encouraged this – most with gifts of money, but the UK sent buses. Unfortunately, they didn’t send spare parts, so when they inevitably broke down they were scrapped. When the choice of public transport was offered to the people of Skopje after independence, many of them were nostalgic for the old double-deckers, but this time they ordered them from China, because (a) they were left-hand drive, and (b) they could get spares.

Independence Arch

We were back by the river Vardar by this stage so took a break from walking and had a coffee aboard the Senigallia, a hotel and restaurant that looks like a pirate ship on the river. Danijela had told us that if Serbia had won the Eurovision song contest the previous night, she would buy us all coffee; they didn’t (Bulgaria did), so instead Intrepid stood the bill.

After a rest we continued back across the Bridge of Civilisations – a veritable plethora of statuary – and into another pedestrian area. At the end of the Stone Bridge are two pairs of statues(!) of saints: the first two translated the bible into a new language called Glagolitic script, which they invented out of a cross between Greek and Hebrew. They did this because the heathens had no written language of their own, and because they were damned if they were going to use Latin (the other of the three main languages of Christianity) because they were from The Eastern Roman empire and didn’t want to use anything Western. This alphabet was later simplified and took the name of one of the saints, Cyril. Yup, they invented Cyrillic script, now the basis of Slavic languages including Russian. There’s even a clock with the first twelve letters of the alphabet instead of numbers.

The Bridge of Civilisations

We then headed onto the Old Town. Many of the shops, especially the jewellers, were shut, because Sunday. Zoran regaled us with tales of how gold was used for all special occasions, from the birth of a child to its first tooth (a sign that it was healthy), and marriages. We tasted orasnica, a local pastry, and took in the sights, sounds, and smells of the place. We finished up by Skopje fortress, as Zoran explained that although it looked impressive from the outside, there’s actually nothing inside.

That was the end of our tour. We walked back through the Old Town, trying to find a place for lunch. Zoran had warned us to check that our chosen establishment (a) took credit cards – many are cash only, and (b) served beer – many are muslim-owned so do not. We also checked that they (c) served food. We found none that fit these requirements, so headed back to the more modern section and found the Riverstone Lounge Bar. Just the ticket, I thought. Wrong. The word “Bar” should not be there, as they told me they didn’t serve alcohol. At this point we gave up, ordered sandwiches, and had some ice cream.   

  

Skopje

The Hotel London B&B, it turns out, is right on Macedonia Square, the central square and statue repository for the city. We breakfasted in the adjoining restaurant – a strange system whereby you collect a token from reception to get the hotel breakfast menu (which differs from the public one). Suitably refreshed (although the concept of Earl Grey tea is alien to them), we planned our first day.

We walked out the door and straight into the statuary. They’re very keen on statues and fountains, so we snapped a load of them. It may surprise you to know that Alexander the Great came from Macedonia. And don’t they let you know it! We’d landed at Alexander the Great Airport, and today, there he was, atop a column, on his horse, in Macedonia Square. Along with a load of other Macedons, ancient and modern. The weather, a bit iffy at first, warmed up considerably. We crossed the river Vardar and looked around the Archaeological Museum, which condenses 70,000 years of history down into around 20 exhibits: from the Old Stone Age up to the present day.

Man On A Horse

We grabbed a coffee and tea before looking around further (140MKD, NZD4.58).  The Old Town beckoned, but, as that is the subject of tomorrow’s guided walk, we resisted its blandishments and instead investigated a restaurant called DropStop, a little off the tourist track for lunch. I sampled the local brew, Skopsko, and had a burger. A little gentle precipitation accompanied us for the walk (about five mins), but it was over by the time we left. We wandered back to our hotel, and the clouds really opened up – thunder and lightning – so we kept under cover for the remainder of the day.

In the evening we met our Intrepid guide Danijela for the first time, and also our fellow Intrepideers. Tim and Jackie, from the UK; Sue & Prue from New Zealand; Steven and Methya from Canada; Carrie from the US (she apologised); and Maureen from Australia. A group of 10, many of whom have Intrepided before. Danijela gave us a brief rundown on what to expect, a recap of our itinerary, and then we went for dinner in the restaurant.

 

Travel Man

We’ve been travelling around but with little to report in the way of adventures over the last week or so. After Hythe we went to visit the ageing parental in Worth and stayed there for three nights. Visiting the ancient Cinque Port of Sandwich and meeting one of Heide’s chums. For those in New Zealand complaining about the cozzie livs, I’d just like to point out that a short black in a Sandwich café set me back £5.40, or NZD12.30. Yeah, you can keep it. We also took in a visit to nearby Deal, and saw Dad's grave monument.

We spent the night at a Heathrow Hotel, Radisson Blu, in order to catch our flight to Cyprus on Monday morning. I recall last time we did this I was less than impressed by the hotel, with it’s boast of being just 0.7 miles from Terminal 5. Yes, if you’ve got a pair of wirecutters. The hotel itself seems to have improved over last time, although the restaurant service was a bit slack. On Monday morning we were up with the lark, breakfasted and ready to catch a bus by 0725. The bus takes half an hour to get down the road, inching along – we amused ourselves by watching the snails speed past us – until reaching a roundabout where it could do a 180° turn and speed along the empty road on the other carriageway, make a couple of stops at more hotels to no avail, then depositing us at Terminal 5 five minutes later.

We got through security with ease, and then had a wait until our gate was announced. The refreshment options through security are somewhat limited: there’s a Gordon Ramsey restaurant (no thanks), Starbucks (double no thanks) or Pret A Manger. We found a seat and had a coffee and a tea: NZD16.08. New Zealand, you don’t know how lucky you are.

We arrived at Larnaca and made our way, in fits and starts, to Nicola’s new parental pile, in a village called Pyrgos outside Limassol, or Lemesos as we should call it. We spent a few days just chilling, playing bridge, and exploring the village (they’ve only lived there six weeks).

Our flights to Skopje were in the evening so on Friday afternoon we boarded the bus to Larnaca Airport and checked ourselves in on Aegean Airlines. After clearing security, we were stunned and amazed: different restaurants! Bars and cafés! Variety! Eat shit, Terminal 5!

Our plane, too, was an improvement on the British Airways flight to Larnaca. The plane was a next-generation A321 Neo, with more legroom, and a handy little clip-type thing on the seat back to hold your mobile phone. The refreshment offered was pasta salad and baklava – a far cry from BA’s measly packet of corn snacks. BA – once the self-proclaimed “world’s favourite airline” - is definitely second division these days, far outclassed by Aegean. We transferred at Athens, where we met some of the friendliest security guards I’ve ever come across, to a smaller Olympic turboprop to Skopje; but even this was more comfortable than BA.

We arrive at around midnight, but as last plane through on a half-empty flight we collected our bags quickly and were met by a very welcoming driver who took us to our hotel whilst giving us some information along the way.

We collapsed into bed, and didn’t need to get up early the following day. Our Balkans Tour doesn’t officially start until 1800 on Saturday.

 

Hythe

We’re off on our adventures again. In the wee small hours, we took a taxi to Wellington Airport, thence to Auckland, Singapore and finally London Gatwick, arriving on Wednesday morning. We flew on a  combination of Air New Zealand and Singapore Airlines, to maximise our airpoints and minimise exposure to the Middle East. We then took a taxi to the Imperial Hotel in Hythe.

Hythe is a small town on the Kent coast, an original member of the Cinque Ports which were once an important trading federation. As with Sandwich, the river silted up and the town is now a little further inland. It dates back to medieval days and has many old buildings.

We visited the church of St. Leonards, which has a crypt with an ossuary, open to the public for the princely sum of £5 each; we were able to admire the bones of some 800 people from the middle ages. The volunteer working there told us about the history and the studies that have been done on the bones, especially the skulls, pointing out some that had been injured and regrown, the state of health of their teeth, and the incidence of malaria-induced anaemia due to the nearby Romney Marshes and their mosquitoes.

I see dead people

Whilst there we noticed some of the local flora…was not local. There was a ti kouka (cabbage tree), harakeke flax and nikau palm planted in the garden of the house next door to the church. We asked the volunteer and she told us that the house had belonged to a senior police officer in the 19^th century who had gone to New Zealand, had a disagreement with the government, and returned after five years…presumably brining these plants back with him, as they looked pretty well-established! You go halfway around the world and…

We also explored the Royal Military Canal, which was built to defend against invasion by Napoleon in 1805-1809. One of the areas that was vulnerable to attack was through the Romney Marshes, so they built the canal and rampart as a defensive structure. Nowadays it’s a pleasant waterway; you can hire a boat and row up and down it.

The following day we hatched a plan to go up the coast and do some shopping along the way. We were thwarted in this ambition by the lack of left luggage facilities en route. Our initial intention had been to go into Folkestone, only to discover that there is no longer a M&S there. A chat with our taxi driver taking us to the station revealed why: last time I was in Folkestone, in 1983, it was a thriving town, but these days it’s virtually dead. This is entirely due to the Channel Tunnel, the ensuing demise of the Folkestone-Boulogne ferry route, and the lack of through traffic. Dover was our next plan, but again, nowhere to leave our luggage prevented us from doing so. We continued up to Sandwich, where we’re staying at the ancestral pile for three nights.

After settling in, we headed up the road in the evening, at mother’s insistence, to go and get dinner at the Blue Pigeons. Formerly a rather scruffy pub, it was updated to a bistro a couple of decades ago, and has undergone yet again a more recent transformation into a much bigger restaurant and boutique hotel a few years ago. It’s quite good, and we’ll be back there again to try it on Saturday night when Heide comes down to stay.

Today, we’re going to try shopping again, this time in Canterbury, taking the bus.

 

Ride The Cyclone

Nicola is once again on duty at Circa Theatre, this time for musical Ride The Cyclone. We have niece Tavi with us at the moment, so we decided to give Charley Noble a try to see if it lived up to the hype. Also, we wanted Tavi and Lauren (who works there) to meet, who are first cousins once removed, apparently. 

Nicola and Tavi both ordered pasta and vegetable sides, and I had a steak with fries. I also had half a dozen oysters beforehand, and with a drink included, the bill was a staggering amount. I think my main objection to CN isn’t so much the food, (they managed to cook a steak adequately), it’s the prices…they charge more for oysters than Logan Brown!

It was a little further than we normally venture for a pre-theatre meal so Nicola was a bit rushed (it took them ¾ hour to bring the mains!), and even Tavi and I had to be pretty sharp to get to Circa with 10 minutes to spare.

The Musical, part of a trilogy set in Uranium City, Saskatchewan (a real place) in an unspecified time period, although there are some modern references such as reality TV which make it seem present-adjacent. It was first produced in 2009, by which time this genre was already prevalent. Six teenagers, all members of the St Cassian High School Chamber Choir, die in an accident on a rollercoaster (The Cyclone), and appear in an afterlife where they are confronted by a Speak Your Fortune machine by the name of Karnak. He offers one of them a chance to return to life. The only catch? The vote must be unanimous between the rest of them.

Each member of the choir gets a chance to stake their claim, in song, to be the one to be saved. Their life stories are related as each one plays the central role in their own story, and the remaining cast play the rest of the parts. Turns out they all have a bit of a history.

After they’ve all given their performances, a decision has to be made…no spoilers (the show’s 16 years old, you can look it up), and one of them returns to life. The remaining five characters wrap up the show with a rousing finale.

Bret McKenzie

Who he? Once a member of Flight Of The Conchords, and former band member of The Black Seeds, Bret has been a New Zealand icon since, like, ages ago. He’s won an Oscar for Best Original Song, and is generally a good bloke. He’s playing some solo shows in support of his new album, Freak Out City, with two shows in Wellington, his home town, in a converted Salvation Army Citadel turned gig venue, Meow Nui. What’s not to like? 

We were originally planning to go for dinner at Charley Noble, a venue I regularly slag off to visitors and locals alike. I used to go there for lunch when I worked at ANZ and have always been unimpressed by the place. And yet…it keeps being mentioned as a Top 10 place to go in Wellington, and Second Cousin Lauren has recently started working there, so I thought we’d give it another try.  But a quick look at the map said otherwise – I’d thought the concert venue was much closer. Another time, perhaps. We ended up in what is becoming a regular haunt, Cuba Street Tavern. They were quite busy, and they’ve changed up the format a little since we were last there – fewer sharing plates, and more main courses. Nevertheless, we made our selection (despite the absence of oysters – they’d run out), and waited. And waited. Eventually, after prompting the waiter, they brought all the food out at once. Previously they’d been of the type to bring things out as they were prepared. The problem this time round was that the chicken skewers were cold. I told the waiter, who told the chef, who (a) served us some hot ones and (b) removed them from the bill. So a slight blot on their copybook there.

We walked around the corner to Meow Nui, where there was a queue. I thought doors opened at 7:00pm, but was clearly misled in this regard. We found some good seats, and then visited the bar for a beer whilst waiting. Around 8:00pm, Bret wanders onto the stage, says “hi”, and starts playing his guitar. A minute later a couple of backing singers wandered on and started giving backing vocals. Then a drummer and a bass player, followed by keyboardist, brass section (sax and trombone), and an electric guitarist, as the song reached its crescendo and everyone was playing. So in the end there were nine of them in the band including Bret. Quite an ensemble!

He played a number of songs old and new, but it was the banter in between that really marked out the gig. He was a member of a comedy ensemble, and this shows. He told us about how they’d (by which he means, he’d) forgotten to bring any merch to one of their shows in the US, so instead started handing out Whittaker’s chocolate bars for the audience to break a piece off and pass around. This then became a thing, and they had to ask everyone coming from New Zealand to bring some Whittaker’s chocolate for them at each gig. They did the same in Australia, but, as he explained, the Aussies weren’t as stoked by this because you can actually get Whittaker’s in Australia, apparently. Nevertheless they continued to do it in New Zealand, and, after hearing about this from the previous night, were stunned when Tiffany from Whittaker’s showed up with a whole bagful of chocolate for the second Wellington show (i.e. the one we were at). So we enjoyed our Whittaker’s chocolate during the show.

If you’re one of my international readers and have never tried Whittaker’s chocolate, try to get hold of some…it’s bloody good!

He also got a volunteer from the audience to help him out with one of his songs. Turned out he’d recruited a Wellington actor (who may have positioned himself deliberately), Tiaki Sharp, so he was able to give a lot of acting ability to his part.

A little later, Bret invited another member of the audience to share a story so he could make up a song on the spot. Owen (I think) provided a tale of heartbreak from his first weeks at university, when he broke up with his girlfriend Sharone, and to ease the pain bought her some mint slice biscuits and a bunch of flowers. Bret wove this into a song: “Sharone, we should’ve broke up by phone” and “mint slices, to ease your emotional crisis” featured in it.

He also played his Oscar-winning song, complete with voices: Man Or Muppet?, and another song in which he parodied Morrissey, Everyone Is Horrid Except Me (and Possibly You), which has, apparently, earned him the lasting enmity of Steven Patrick. He didn’t give the impression that he was bothered by this.

And then – surprise! – Jemaine Clement appeared on stage, and they reprised one of the Flight Of The Conchords songs together: The Most Beautiful Girl (in the Room).

They left the stage but were back in what seemed microseconds to perform a two-song encore, before the lights came up. That set list in full can be found here.

Right, I’ve ordered the new album, should be here in a couple of days.