Hythe

We’re off on our adventures again. In the wee small hours, we took a taxi to Wellington Airport, thence to Auckland, Singapore and finally London Gatwick, arriving on Wednesday morning. We flew on a  combination of Air New Zealand and Singapore Airlines, to maximise our airpoints and minimise exposure to the Middle East. We then took a taxi to the Imperial Hotel in Hythe.

Hythe is a small town on the Kent coast, an original member of the Cinque Ports which were once an important trading federation. As with Sandwich, the river silted up and the town is now a little further inland. It dates back to medieval days and has many old buildings.

We visited the church of St. Leonards, which has a crypt with an ossuary, open to the public for the princely sum of £5 each; we were able to admire the bones of some 800 people from the middle ages. The volunteer working there told us about the history and the studies that have been done on the bones, especially the skulls, pointing out some that had been injured and regrown, the state of health of their teeth, and the incidence of malaria-induced anaemia due to the nearby Romney Marshes and their mosquitoes.

I see dead people

Whilst there we noticed some of the local flora…was not local. There was a ti kouka (cabbage tree), harakeke flax and nikau palm planted in the garden of the house next door to the church. We asked the volunteer and she told us that the house had belonged to a senior police officer in the 19^th century who had gone to New Zealand, had a disagreement with the government, and returned after five years…presumably brining these plants back with him, as they looked pretty well-established! You go halfway around the world and…

We also explored the Royal Military Canal, which was built to defend against invasion by Napoleon in 1805-1809. One of the areas that was vulnerable to attack was through the Romney Marshes, so they built the canal and rampart as a defensive structure. Nowadays it’s a pleasant waterway; you can hire a boat and row up and down it.

The following day we hatched a plan to go up the coast and do some shopping along the way. We were thwarted in this ambition by the lack of left luggage facilities en route. Our initial intention had been to go into Folkestone, only to discover that there is no longer a M&S there. A chat with our taxi driver taking us to the station revealed why: last time I was in Folkestone, in 1983, it was a thriving town, but these days it’s virtually dead. This is entirely due to the Channel Tunnel, the ensuing demise of the Folkestone-Boulogne ferry route, and the lack of through traffic. Dover was our next plan, but again, nowhere to leave our luggage prevented us from doing so. We continued up to Sandwich, where we’re staying at the ancestral pile for three nights.

After settling in, we headed up the road in the evening, at mother’s insistence, to go and get dinner at the Blue Pigeons. Formerly a rather scruffy pub, it was updated to a bistro a couple of decades ago, and has undergone yet again a more recent transformation into a much bigger restaurant and boutique hotel a few years ago. It’s quite good, and we’ll be back there again to try it on Saturday night when Heide comes down to stay.

Today, we’re going to try shopping again, this time in Canterbury, taking the bus.

 

Ride The Cyclone

Nicola is once again on duty at Circa Theatre, this time for musical Ride The Cyclone. We have niece Tavi with us at the moment, so we decided to give Charley Noble a try to see if it lived up to the hype. Also, we wanted Tavi and Lauren (who works there) to meet, who are first cousins once removed, apparently. 

Nicola and Tavi both ordered pasta and vegetable sides, and I had a steak with fries. I also had half a dozen oysters beforehand, and with a drink included, the bill was a staggering amount. I think my main objection to CN isn’t so much the food, (they managed to cook a steak adequately), it’s the prices…they charge more for oysters than Logan Brown!

It was a little further than we normally venture for a pre-theatre meal so Nicola was a bit rushed (it took them ¾ hour to bring the mains!), and even Tavi and I had to be pretty sharp to get to Circa with 10 minutes to spare.

The Musical, part of a trilogy set in Uranium City, Saskatchewan (a real place) in an unspecified time period, although there are some modern references such as reality TV which make it seem present-adjacent. It was first produced in 2009, by which time this genre was already prevalent. Six teenagers, all members of the St Cassian High School Chamber Choir, die in an accident on a rollercoaster (The Cyclone), and appear in an afterlife where they are confronted by a Speak Your Fortune machine by the name of Karnak. He offers one of them a chance to return to life. The only catch? The vote must be unanimous between the rest of them.

Each member of the choir gets a chance to stake their claim, in song, to be the one to be saved. Their life stories are related as each one plays the central role in their own story, and the remaining cast play the rest of the parts. Turns out they all have a bit of a history.

After they’ve all given their performances, a decision has to be made…no spoilers (the show’s 16 years old, you can look it up), and one of them returns to life. The remaining five characters wrap up the show with a rousing finale.

Bret McKenzie

Who he? Once a member of Flight Of The Conchords, and former band member of The Black Seeds, Bret has been a New Zealand icon since, like, ages ago. He’s won an Oscar for Best Original Song, and is generally a good bloke. He’s playing some solo shows in support of his new album, Freak Out City, with two shows in Wellington, his home town, in a converted Salvation Army Citadel turned gig venue, Meow Nui. What’s not to like? 

We were originally planning to go for dinner at Charley Noble, a venue I regularly slag off to visitors and locals alike. I used to go there for lunch when I worked at ANZ and have always been unimpressed by the place. And yet…it keeps being mentioned as a Top 10 place to go in Wellington, and Second Cousin Lauren has recently started working there, so I thought we’d give it another try.  But a quick look at the map said otherwise – I’d thought the concert venue was much closer. Another time, perhaps. We ended up in what is becoming a regular haunt, Cuba Street Tavern. They were quite busy, and they’ve changed up the format a little since we were last there – fewer sharing plates, and more main courses. Nevertheless, we made our selection (despite the absence of oysters – they’d run out), and waited. And waited. Eventually, after prompting the waiter, they brought all the food out at once. Previously they’d been of the type to bring things out as they were prepared. The problem this time round was that the chicken skewers were cold. I told the waiter, who told the chef, who (a) served us some hot ones and (b) removed them from the bill. So a slight blot on their copybook there.

We walked around the corner to Meow Nui, where there was a queue. I thought doors opened at 7:00pm, but was clearly misled in this regard. We found some good seats, and then visited the bar for a beer whilst waiting. Around 8:00pm, Bret wanders onto the stage, says “hi”, and starts playing his guitar. A minute later a couple of backing singers wandered on and started giving backing vocals. Then a drummer and a bass player, followed by keyboardist, brass section (sax and trombone), and an electric guitarist, as the song reached its crescendo and everyone was playing. So in the end there were nine of them in the band including Bret. Quite an ensemble!

He played a number of songs old and new, but it was the banter in between that really marked out the gig. He was a member of a comedy ensemble, and this shows. He told us about how they’d (by which he means, he’d) forgotten to bring any merch to one of their shows in the US, so instead started handing out Whittaker’s chocolate bars for the audience to break a piece off and pass around. This then became a thing, and they had to ask everyone coming from New Zealand to bring some Whittaker’s chocolate for them at each gig. They did the same in Australia, but, as he explained, the Aussies weren’t as stoked by this because you can actually get Whittaker’s in Australia, apparently. Nevertheless they continued to do it in New Zealand, and, after hearing about this from the previous night, were stunned when Tiffany from Whittaker’s showed up with a whole bagful of chocolate for the second Wellington show (i.e. the one we were at). So we enjoyed our Whittaker’s chocolate during the show.

If you’re one of my international readers and have never tried Whittaker’s chocolate, try to get hold of some…it’s bloody good!

He also got a volunteer from the audience to help him out with one of his songs. Turned out he’d recruited a Wellington actor (who may have positioned himself deliberately), Tiaki Sharp, so he was able to give a lot of acting ability to his part.

A little later, Bret invited another member of the audience to share a story so he could make up a song on the spot. Owen (I think) provided a tale of heartbreak from his first weeks at university, when he broke up with his girlfriend Sharone, and to ease the pain bought her some mint slice biscuits and a bunch of flowers. Bret wove this into a song: “Sharone, we should’ve broke up by phone” and “mint slices, to ease your emotional crisis” featured in it.

He also played his Oscar-winning song, complete with voices: Man Or Muppet?, and another song in which he parodied Morrissey, Everyone Is Horrid Except Me (and Possibly You), which has, apparently, earned him the lasting enmity of Steven Patrick. He didn’t give the impression that he was bothered by this.

And then – surprise! – Jemaine Clement appeared on stage, and they reprised one of the Flight Of The Conchords songs together: The Most Beautiful Girl (in the Room).

They left the stage but were back in what seemed microseconds to perform a two-song encore, before the lights came up. That set list in full can be found here.

Right, I’ve ordered the new album, should be here in a couple of days.

 

More Cricket

The Black Caps series against South Africa went down to the wire with the fifth match in Christchurch, where the South Africans put on a display of batting, reaching a total of 187. Not an impossible task, but they were able to contain the New Zealand batters. Wickets fell regularly and no-one was able to get a real total going. Eventually they achieved 154 in response. South Africa won the match by 33 runs, and the series 3-2. 

But that’s not what we want to see! The White Ferns had already wrapped up their series 3-1 in Wellington, and performed another demolition, setting a total of 194 and then bowling the South Africans out for 109, a 92 run margin of victory, to give a 4-1 series score.

They then moved onto the longer 50 over format a few days later, again in Christchurch, where South Africa exacted their revenge. The White Ferns batted first, and set, by their standards, a modest total of 268 for their opponents to hit. They made a good start with a wicket in the first over, and both openers out for 30, but South Africa then put on 122 runs for the third wicket. The Ferns never managed to slow them down, and despite losing wickets regularly, they had a relatively easy path, until the pre-penultimate over: needing 24 off the last three overs, they scored just two, and lost a wicket. Suddenly, the equation is 22 from 2 overs. They scored 8 in the 49^th over, leaving 14 from the last over. A couple of singles and a six , then a couple of dot balls, left South Africa needing a six off the last ball. There was a long talk out in the middle between Suzie Bates and her captain, Melie Kerr. Unfortunately she bowled a sitter which Reyneke slogged for the required six. South Africa won, by two wickets, off the final ball.

On to Wellington for the final two matches of the series, and the South Africans have their tails up. It was an absolutely stunning day, with early cloud clearing to perfect blue skies all round. There was a nagging southerly breeze so it was a good job we were inside, in the Long Room.

This time, wickets didn’t fall. Although they lost their opener, Tazmin Brits, for 9, the second wicket partnership between opener and captain Laura Woolvardt and Anneke Bosch took them to 167/2, and even after that partnerships continued, with South Africa finally setting a total of 346/6. This was not helped by at least six – SIX! – chances going down. OK, some of them were hard chances, but in many cases the ball bounced out of the fingers. Coach Rory recommends some catching practice before the final match!

South Africa had set the White Ferns a mountain to climb: the biggest run chase in Women’s cricket. The previous most successful was India’s chasing down of 339 against Australia in 2025. A massive run rate of almost seven an over was required. The loss of Suzie Bates early put them at 21/1, and onto the pitch walks Melie Kerr.

What happened next was just…staggering. First, a 52 run partnership before Georgia Plimmer was out for 23, and then, having lost Green and Halliday for relatively low totals, put on a 120 run partnership with Izzy Gaze for the 5^th wicket. Gaze was striking the ball well, making 68 off 49 balls. The total was now 250/5, with 12 overs remaining. Still quite a total to reach, at 8 runs per over. But this is Melie Kerr we’re talking about, and she continued to build partnerships – 40 with Izzy Sharp and 39 with sister Jess Kerr. They needed 18 runs off the last two overs. They took six from the 49^th, and were left needing 12 off the final. Two fours off the first two balls brought it within reach – just three needed off the last four. A scampered two left the scores tied with three to go. No messing, Melie Kerr hit it for four, to win the match and level the series 1-1, with two balls in hand. Kerr finished on 179 not out, having scored over half the runs required herself.  

After the match, the accolades flowed, as all the records achieved were talked over. Amazingly, this isn’t even Melie Kerr’s highest score in an ODI! She achieved 232 not out against minnows Ireland in 2018 – but this is against one of the world’s top teams. It’s the highest successful run chase in women’s cricket. Ever.

The next match, the decider, is again in Wellington, on Saturday. We’ll be going along, and expecting fireworks!

Cricket At The Hnry

Wellington’s stadium has gone through several iterations as name sponsors have changed. It started out as Westpac Stadium, then changed to Sky. The latest sponsor is Hnry, a New Zealand tax accounting company. So we now have the Hnry Stadium. Pronounced Hnry.

Whilst international test cricket is played at the Basin Reserve, Twenty20 and ODIs are increasing played at the Hnry, as they have floodlighting for day/night matches. This was the third match in a five match T20 series against South Africa. Both men’s and women’s teams are playing, leading to an eight-hour festival of cricket. 

This match is included in our Gold membership of Cricket Wellington, so we could access the member’s lounge. This is right under the scoreboard, which makes tracking what’s going on a little harder for us, as the screen at the other end of the ground is used largely for advertising, and only rarely do they update the scores there. Indoors, however, they also have several tv screens so we can keep up with the match. Also handy for the action replays!

The White Ferns were up first, starting at 2:45. We’d got there in plenty of time, and ensconced ourselves by the window. The Ferns are 2-1 up in the series, with a WLW record behind them. South Africa won the toss, decided to bat, and amassed a reasonable score of 159, setting the Ferns their highest chase total at home. Losing opener Gaze in the second over didn’t help, and then Plimmer fell for 29 after keeping captain Melie Kerr company for a bit. It was the partnerships of Kerr/Devine and Devine/Halliday that really sealed the deal, and by the time Devine was out for 64 they needed just another 11 runs from 17 balls, which they achieved with nine balls to spare. This sealed the series win 3-1, with one more match to play in Christchurch.

There was a bit of a wait for the men’s game, as it is timed to be shown after the TV News has finished at 7:00pm. We availed ourselves of dinner from the member’s lounge catering…not brilliant.

The Black Caps are also 2-1 up on the series, having lost the first game but absolutely pantsing the Proteas with bat and ball in the next two games – bowling them out for 107 after setting a target of 175 in the second match, and then restricting them to 139/9 in the third – a total they saw off in less than 17 overs. There were line-up changes for this match, bringing in some newer players, and also losing Tom Latham to injury. South Africa won the toss and decided to bat, setting a target of an achievable 165 for the Black Caps.

Unfortunately, the Black Caps failed to dazzle with the bat. No-one really got going and every time they seemed to get settled, another wicket fell. Neesham, in particular, who should have held the lower order together, was found wanting. Having skied the ball twice and been dropped twice in succession, what does he do? Hits it up again, and third time was a charm…caught for 6. Too much was being asked of the rest of the lower order, and South Africa eventually wrapped it up for 145, winning by 19 runs.

This leaves the men’s series tied at 2-2, with the final match on Wednesday in Christchurch. Should be a nailbiter!

 

The Rocky Horror Show

As the nights are starting to cool down and close in, the indoor entertainment scene in Wellington starts to liven up. Now showing at St James Theatre is a new production of The Rocky Horror Show. Nicola claims never to have seen the film all the way through, so this was a no-brainer.

First though…dinner, and time for another visit to perennial faves, Loggy B’s (Logan Brown to you). Last time we were there we had the leisurely Taste Of Logan Brown degustation menu, but this time we needed a quicker meal so were on the standard 3-course deal – still a snip at $95 each.  

It’s a short walk down the road and round the corner to St James Theatre, and we were ensconced in plenty of time for the show to begin. You know how it goes, right? Brad and Janet get stranded on the road and go to the local castle (!?) for help – there to be enmeshed in the goings-on at the castle, orchestrated by Frank N Furter, a transvestite from Transylvania, in the galaxy Transexual; ably assisted by RiffRaff, Magenta and Columbia. They did The Time Warp, Sweet Transexual, Dammit Janet and all the other songs. A lot of people had made the effort to dress up for the occasion, but I think we were channelling our inner Janet and Brad. All jolly good fun, catch it if you can!

 

Hutt Sounds 2026

Where does the time go?

Yes, well, I’ve been busy, and haven’t had time to blog for a while. I’ll try to fill in the gaps as best I can.

We booked early for Hutt Sounds again this year…almost as soon as they announced who the line-up would be. Yes, it’s possible to buy “early bird” tickets blind, without knowing who you’re going to see, but I was cautious. When they announced the line-up for the related Selwyn Sounds I was a little disheartened, as their headliner was Ronan Keating, who I have no particular desire to see. In past years, Selwyn, Auckland and Hutt have all had the same line-up…but this year, they’ve varied it, and the headliner is Tony Hadley, formerly of Spandau Ballet. Not a Keating to be seen! I booked the tickets.

We drove up to Upper Hutt early, with a plan to secure parking and go and see an exhibition of Japanese art at Whirinaki Whare Taonga beforehand. There was lots to admire, but I particularly liked this piece:

We lunched at the adjoining Dough Bakery café, then walked the short walk to Brewtown. Drizzle had set in in the morning, but we had rain gear with us and the forecast was for the weather to clear in the afternoon.

We needn’t have worried. This year, they’ve changed the format. Whereas in previous years we’ve taken our chances and sat outside in an open field, this year they’ve scaled it down somewhat and the whole of the audience is in the covered area – which previously had housed the food trucks. I don’t know why this was – maybe residents complaining about congestion? They hold several events at Brewtown, and I can see why it might be annoying if you live there; it’s right in a residential area.

We found a good spot, and settled in for the first act: Jan Hellriegel, a kiwi singer of the late 80s/early 90s. Never heard of her. She sang some songs, some with guitar, some with piano. Nothing about them inspired me to go out and investigate any further.

Next act: someone I’ve heard of! And way down the order in terms of who I know, but there are reasons for this; Lloyd Cole, Commotionless (as he has been for some time) playing a guitar set of some of his better-known songs for half an hour or so.

The next band out of the box were Mi-Sex, another Kiwi ensemble of the 80s. Lead singer Steve Gilpin died in a car crash in 1992, but has been replaced by Steve Balbi, an Australian musician (formerly of Noiseworks) since the band reformed in 2011. They released four albums in the 80s, and it seems a lot of people knew their work – it being a kiwi crowd, and Mi-sex were originally from Wellington. They provided a lot more energy than the two opening acts, and the crowd really started to get going. I know one song – Computer Games, which is on a compilation CD (yes, I still have CDs!) from the 80s. It was, I think, their biggest hit, so they naturally saved it to the end. Anyway, I have been inspired to investigate further and am awaiting the arrival of a greatest hits CD in the post (yes, I still have post!)

They were followed by another hi-energy group, Fun Lovin’ Criminals. They’re of a slightly later era, 90s rap-rock. They’re known for two major hits, The Fun-Lovin’ Criminal, which they opened with, and Scooby Snacks, noted for its frequent sampling of Quentin Tarantino movie dialogue – so much so that he sued, and won, a share of the royalties. They have, apparently, been successful with some other songs as well, and they provided an entertaining 50 minute set, finishing up with the aforementioned Scooby Snacks.

The next band on were When The Cat's Away, a successful (in New Zealand) girl band, again from the late 80s/early 90s, who were known for their cover versions of relatively unknown songs. Included in their set was Prince’s Let’s Go Crazy, to which they failed to do justice. I hadn’t heard any of their other songs, so took the opportunity to visit the food trucks at this point. Apparently, though, some people were here specifically for them, as when they finished their set, quite a few packed up and left!

And now, the moment we’ve been waiting for, the headline act! Tony Hadley took to the stage, and opened with…a Nina Simone number, Feeling Good. Nice song, but we’re here for the Spandau Ballet stuff, Tony! Fortunately he got on with it, and took us into To Cut A Long Story Short and Highly Strung, then several more of his hits. He plugged a couple of new songs (mediocre) and also included a cover of Queen’s Somebody To Love, which he shouldn’t have, really. He finished up with classics Gold and True, as you might expect. Overall a polished performance, lots of crowd participation, and yes, we know the words! That set list in full can be found here.

As usual, the show finished on the dot of 9:00pm, presumably in accordance with local ordinances, and we were back home by 10.

 

NZSO Evening

Due to reasons, we’re being schmoozed by the NZSO. They’re holding an event at Loggy B’s, better known as Logan Brown, and we’re invited along. The two institutions have enjoyed a long association, and we’ve been to some of their events before. 

It was an early start, so we set out to arrive by 5:30pm. In fact, we were little early as we found a park, if not quite Hollywood style, then at least Melrose. We wandered down Cuba Street to Logan Brown, and were greeted by Marc, who is the head honcho of the NZSO. He didn’t know us from Adam, of course, so after a brief hello he moved on to the next group arriving behind us.

We were offered wine, and LB staff walked around with canapés, which, being Logan Brown, were delicious and beautiful. We chatted a while with the NZSO marketing people, then I spotted Steve Logan and had a long talk with him. Then Nicola found the timpanist, Lawrence, who she knows through her other associations and we chatted with him for a while. Marc then tapped on a glass for silence, and delivered a short speech, followed by the lead flautist. Then we had a slightly more substantial food offering, hot-smoked salmon, terrine and other bits and pieces.

All jolly good fun and now that we’re on their list, who know what else we’ll be invited to?

Bill Bailey - Vaudevillian

How many times have we been to see Bill Bailey? Loads. Does this stop us from going to see him again? It does not. Because he’s brilliant. He’s back, this time with a show called Vaudevillian. 

Obviously, dinner first. We booked into perennial favourites Mr. Go’s, at a slightly later time than usual. It was packed! Clearly everyone else had had the same idea, and it took somewhat longer than usual for our food to come out, so we were a bit rushed towards the end. This caused some issues when it came to paying, as I had the Mosaic Passport, but even so it came to more than I was expecting *. We paid and hoofed it up to the road to take our seats with minutes to spare at the Michael Fowler Centre.

On came Bill, to rapturous applause, and he started off with describing how wonderful our country is and how much he enjoys coming here…obviously a crowd-pleaser. He then took issue with one tiny part of our culture, and that was a pie that he’d bought at a roadside café. Not that there was anything wrong with the pie per se, but he likened the temperature of the contents to lava, magma, molten rock in general. At this point he was heckled by an audience member. At first he couldn’t catch what they were saying, so various members of the audience continued to shout it until he understood: “always blow on the pie!” This was something that he’d never heard before, but is familiar to Kiwis. Fortunately, he had a screen cunningly placed on the stage in front of him (presumably operated off-stage) that supplied him with the answer. “Have I walked into a meme?” he asked. Yes, Bill, you have. No doubt he continued to relate this story throughout the rest of his tour.

The rest of the show continued his usual themes of whimsy, musical interludes and general entertainment. He’d warned us at the beginning that he was unwell, and was recovering from a cough that made him swear. He called it the “Fuckough” and he did it every time he coughed. He ranted about a certain orange character in the White House, and complained about the current state of politics in the UK. As usual, he invited audience participation, particularly for song suggestions for the various musical instruments he played, which included a one-stringed lute and a miniature banjo. Ever heard Enter Sandman on a one-stringed lute? Well, now I have!

As always, he gives value for money with a show that lasted over two hours, including encore. Can’t wait for his next one!

* Next morning, I got a call from Mr. Go's. Apparently they had two tables booked for someone called Rory, and they'd charged me the wrong one. Everything got sorted out.

Those shows in full:

Thoughtifier (Nov 2023)

En Route To Normal (Mar 2021)

Larks In Transit (Oct 2016)

Limboland (Nov 2014)

Qualmpeddler (2013)

Dandelion Mind (2011)

 

Monument

Circa Theatre continues to run with thought-provoking content. Monument follows similar themes to other recent productions at Circa such as Burn Her and Prima Facie concerning women in power and the pressures and contradictions that they face. Nicola was, as ever, on ushering duty. 

We decided to dine in-house at ChouChou, the newly-revamped restaurant at Circa. We both had the burgers – the Camembert and the Royale. Mine was, frankly, disappointing. I’m running out of things to choose from their menu so we might be ditching them as an option soon.

The play was in Circa 2, the smaller theatre, with a 100 minute runtime and no interval. The show kicks off in a hotel room, and that’s where all the action takes place. In this case, newly-elected youngest ever woman premiere Edith Aldridge is facing her first live appearance after gaining power. All of her usual support crew are stranded at a fogged-in Auckland airport (the play has been transplanted from its native Australian setting), and a last-minute make-up artist has been drafted in from a local department store. At first Edith is distrustful of Rosie and doubts her abilities, but over the course of the play opens up more, listens to advice from a member of the younger generation, and they change their decisions about dress and make-up accordingly. Rosie’s discourse on how much make-up you need for the “no make-up look” is illuminating in the TikTok and Insta era. Their relationships with the men in their lives, alive and dead, come into play, and these also end up on the chopping block.

There’s a serious message in the sometimes hilarious exchanges, and the positions they find themselves in: about perceptions, media and politics. Go see it if you get a chance.

 

Dave Dobbyn

Or Sir Dave Dobbyn, as he now is…is a kiwi icon and legend. Originally in a band called Th’Dudes, he then went on to form DD Smash before continuing his career as a solo artist. He’s been around since the 70s. 

He keeps cropping up in the Tuesday night quiz at The Old Bailey, and every time he does, we don’t know the song. As he announced his tour we thought this might be a good chance to catch up with some Kiwiana culture, and also be able to answer the questions when they come up at quiz!

We went for dinner at Ombra to complete our set of stamps for the Mosaic passport…as well as the fact that we haven’t been to Ombra in a while, and it’s pretty good. It’s a Venetian-inspired Italian in the same format as their other restaurants – food comes out when they feel like it rather than any of that old-fashioned first-course-then-main-course thing.

A quick trot down Cuba Street landed us at the Opera House, which was sold out to the third level gallery – not often used for concerts. We were up in the nosebleed seats. On came the support act – a chap called Anthonie Tonnon, who as well as being a musician is the operator of Whanganui’s Durie Hill Elevator. He played a set which was part electronic music, part performance, and part repartee.

Then on came Sir Dave and his band, to tumultuous applause. He played through a set which clearly everyone in the crowd (except us) knew, and interspersed the songs with chat about the history of the songs, touring, his previous bands, life, the universe, and everything. Apparently he was thrown out of the Opera House after one particularly rambunctious gig way back in the seventies; on his return this time the stage manager (the same one!) said “you’re back then”. He couldn’t think of anything to reply to that, other than “sorry”. Hopefully he won’t have to stay away for another 40 years this time!

He gave a good long set, followed by two encores of two songs apiece. The full setlist can be found here.

So that’s Dave Dobbyn. Now we know.

 

Tim Freedman

Tim Freedman is coming to New Zealand, and Wellington, for the first time! Who is Tim Freedman? He’s the frontman of Aussie band The Whitlams, who hit fame, fortune and grief in the 90’s. He’s the only survivor of the original threesome, the other two members having killed themselves in 1996 and 2000. He carried on with new musicians, keeping the name The Whitlams for most of his career, but also touring as himself (I saw him in London as Tim Freedman). The band have recently reunited and released new material under the name The Whitlams Black Stump, but for his current tour of New Zealand he is performing just under his name.

He's playing at the San Fran, one of Wellington’s smaller venues with a capacity of 500. As it’s in Cuba Street this gave us an opportunity to gain another stamp on our Mosaic passport by dining at Kisa, where we overordered to the extent that we took some of it home in boxes. We then headed up the street to get there in time to stake a place at one of the few tables at the back of the venue. But wait? What’s this? The whole venue has been set out with tables and chairs! Apparently they’re not expecting the youth crowd for this gig, even though we’ve seen previous performers there who attract a somewhat vintage crowd of punks, goths etc. So we staked a place upon one of the benches near the back. Maybe the fact that the doors opened at 6:00pm was a clue...?

The support act came on about half an hour later: Tyson Smith is a local Wellington musician, and played a set of songs old and new (he released an album in 2014, and another last year) with his acoustic guitar. The songs are very long so he only got through five of them. 

After a bit of clearing up and tuning up, Ollie took the stage, shortly followed by Tim Freedman. Together they make up 40% (he’d done the maths for us, and told us this) of The Whitlams Black Stump, who tour and produce albums under that name. their latest, Kookaburra, is what they’re promoting with this latest tour, which is also visiting some of the main centres in Australia, playing with symphony orchestras rather than the small venues they’re playing in New Zealand. Unfortunately they've yet to make it available in New Zealand in CD format, so I haven't bought it.

He started out with Charlie No. 1 and Charlie No. 2, both familiar tunes to the cognoscenti, before diving in to new material. Tim sat at his keyboard throughout, and Ollie variously played pedal steel guitar and other guitar parts. At no point did he wield “one of those keyboard axes, wanted to get out and dance away from the piano”. They played a mixture of songs, but definitely leaning to those that featured a piano-based arrangement, rather than some of the more guitar-oriented tunes of yesteryear. 

They wrapped up the set by around 8:30pm so us fogies could take ourselves off to bed.

Le Petit Chef

Le Petit Chef is a self-described “immersive dining experience” with “the world’s smallest chef”. It’s available around the world, and in Wellington it’s put on at the Intercontinental hotel.

We’d been enjoined to arrive half an hour early, although this appeared to be for their benefit rather than ours as there wasn’t any additional entertainment of drinks, just their standard hotel choice. We were eventually ushered into what appeared to be a meeting room set up for dining. Above each table was a projector which is the source of the animated show. Tables are set for four people, so we were sharing with a couple from Kapiti.

Before the dinner started the host introduced herself, took us through emergency procedures, and explained what was going to happen. Then the lights went down, and the first of a series of skits was projected onto our table and our plates as the chef, an animated character, sets about preparing the first course from his garden. It’s billed as “3D animation” but is, in fact, decidedly 2D.

 In between each course there’s a similar show, lasting a few minutes each. The food that comes out afterwards does somewhat resemble what is in the animation but isn’t necessarily an exact match. The courses were quite small, but with five of them there was sufficient that we didn’t go hungry. Overall the quality was what you’d expect in a hotel restaurant – good, but not outstanding.

Caprese salad

Bouillabaisse

Chicken with truffle

Chocolate mousse

Was it worth it? It was good, but not brilliant. A bit of a gimmick. Apparently, there’s a whole series of these with further additions to the story, but I don’t think we’ll be going back for more.

Paul Kelly

Veteran Aussie raconteur Paul Kelly is touring Australia and New Zealand. I’ve known about him for many a decade – even saw him playing at Shepherd’s Bush Empire before we moved to New Zealand!  I thought it was high time I saw him again.

As usual we arranged dinner first. The wider restaurant group that operates Mr. Go’s are currently running a promotion whereby you collect stamps each time you visit, with the aim of getting $50 reduction once you’ve collected them all. We’d already registered Parla, and collected a second stamp at Mr Go’s who provided us with their usual high-quality EastAsian inspired nosh. And we’ll be visiting Kisa soon as well.

It's but a short hop, skip, and jump down Cuba Street to the Michael Fowler Centre. We were there in time for the support act Reb Fountain, a kiwi who’s been around a while a has made half a dozen albums in the country/folk style so beloved of New Zealand women. She acquitted herself well, with tunes old and new.

Then it was time for the main act. Paul Kelly is supported by a 6-piece band, and he played a whole bunch of old well-known songs. There was quite a bit of newer material, which I was expecting to be honest, as he’s been busy - releasing 13 albums since I saw him last (he’s done 28 in total in various guises)…but there was enough of the recognisable tunes, and a lot of chat about them in between as well. He finished up the set with three classics: Dumb Things, How To Make Gravy, and From Little Things Big Things Grow, which got everyone singing along. He then returned for a four-song encore including Leaps And Bounds, one of his earliest hits. That set list in full can be found here.

As ever, he gave us solid entertainment with a set that ran well over the allocated two-hour time slot.

Rueben’s Hot Sister

I haven’t been to Choice Bros in, like, ages. Why not? It’s centrally located on Ghuznee Street, brews their own beers, and is open during the week. Years ago, it was a regular stop for me for a burger and beer when I was taking tours. But then, something changed…they decided, without consulting me, to change to an all-chicken menu. Yes, the only burger available was a chicken burger. Now, I don’t mind the occasional chicken burger, but when I want a beef burger, that’s what I want…so I stopped going.

Earlier this week, whilst reading reviews of Burgers Wellington, I came across their offering, and observed that it was, in fact, made with…beef. Well, blow me down! A quick investigation revealed that they’ve abandoned their whites-only policy, and are now back in the business of offering proper burgers. Again, they did not consult me on this decision, so I don’t know how long they’ve been missing out on my custom.

 After my work on Saturday I decided to drop by and sample their effort.

Rueben’s (sic) Hot Sister is described on the Burger Wellington website like this: Smashed beef patty with hot honey–cured beef short rib, smoked provolone, spiced pickled cabbage, pickled onions and spicy Russian dressing in a Cottage Lane brioche bun, with housemade kettle chips and Kāpiti brie bacon cheese dip.

It looks like this: 

There is no DVB beer match as, again, I’m in a brew pub so I’ll have whatever they recommend – in this case, Choice Bros Perfect Day low carb lager.

There was a bit of a wait for the burger as it was a popular choice and the bar was, if not full, at least reasonably patronised for a Saturday lunchtime. When it came though, it was good. This is a proper burger made by people who make proper burgers. All the necessary ingredients were there, and there was none of that extraneous “salad” that some insist on including in the burger. The pickled cabbage and onions provided some necessary crunch and flavour, and the cheese was tasty. The housemade (apparently; they tasted like they were out of a packet) kettle chips had, hover, gone a bit soft. Nevertheless they fulfilled their function of scooping up the brie and bacon dip. I felt, however, that just sticking to chips might have been a better option in this case. I scored it 7/10, because although it’s a good burger, it’s not an exceptional burger. I’m really looking for that one that blows your socks off to score higher.

 

Bosh

OK, now for something a bit different. After bridge we went out to lunch at Café Polo, one of our local eateries which could soon become the best café in the area. Why do I say that? Well, the best café in the area always used to be The Larder, but a short while ago Jacob & Sarah sold up, and it is now under new management. So far, nothing has changed, but we’ll have to keep a weather eye on it.

Café Polo’s offering is called Bosh, and is something a bit different to your usual burger: It’s a pork and prawn patty. Say what? Yes, you read that right. It’s described on the Burger Wellington site like this: Harringtons pork and prawn nugget with sweet and sour sauce, pineapple, pickled capsicum and onion, coriander, spring onion salad and crispy chilli mayo in Cafe Polo’s housemade sesame seed milk bun, with salt and pepper chips. The DVB beer match is The Classic lager.

It looks like this: 

How did it taste? As you can see, there’s a lot going on here, so much so that it’s held together with a stick...this is a burger for tackling with a knife and fork. According to the chalkboard description, the patty is 80% pork. The sweet and sour, and the pineapple combine well together, and the whole thing just zinged off the tastebuds. Unlike some burgers that have had the kitchen sink thrown at them, this is one that’s well thought out, with sweetness, sourness, spice, crunch and flavour. The chips were crunchy and generously seasoned, too. This is the best burger I’ve had so far this year, and I’m scoring it a 8/10. It’s not quite a perfect burger - pickupability, flavour and patty composition all play a part; as has been mentioned, I’m a hard man to please!

The Coastal Rogue

Another local excursion for a burger at the weekend, and this time we picked perennial favourites Little Sprig, a branch of the Sprig & Fern chain of pubs. Their offering is called The Coastal Rogue, described on the Burger Wellington site thus: Grass-fed beef blend patty with liquid cheese, crispy onions, bacon-jalapeño jam and Sprig sauce in a housemade brioche bun, with shoestring fries.

It looks like this:

Yes, I borrowed this pic from the website, as I forgot to take my own pic. 

There is no DVB beer match, because Sprig & Fern are a brewery and don’t sell other people’s beers.

There’s not much different to this burger, except the liquid cheese – effectively a cheese sauce rather than a slab of cheese on top. The crispy onions were a nice touch, and the fries were different to their usual, which are normally handmade and can veer to the soggy side on occasion. But not this one! They were crispy and well-seasoned.

This is as good a burger as the Burger Liquor one, so I’m giving it a score of 7/10.