Milford Track Pt. 2

Day 3

This is where it starts to get serious. A 6:00am start, as we had some uphill to do in the morning. Day 3’s level of difficulty is described as “challenging” (Day 1 was “easy”, Day 2 “moderate”). The first part of the ascent is OK. You stop for a B&B (bladder and bottle stop – empty one, fill the other. Make sure to get this the right way round), and then begin the zigzag route up to Mackinnon Pass, the highest point of the track. It’s important to be prepared for weather on this section. I’d started off fully togged up, but actually found this too hot, so stripped off waterproof layers and walked in just two layers until we were about halfway up. By then the temperature had dropped significantly as we rose up towards 1,000m above sea level, and it was time to start putting clothes back on. By the time we reached the Mackinnon Memorial we were at 1,154m (for comparison, Ben Nevis is 1,345m). We stopped there for a hot drink (yes, there was a guide who’d got there ahead of us whilst also carrying three thermos flasks), and admired the views. There was a family of weka who hang around there, with a couple of chicks. From the memorial it’s a short walk to the Pass Hut, where we had lunch.

We're heading up there?

Weka mum with chicks

At the top

From the top it’s possible to look back to where we’d come from, and also to look forward and see the next hut far, far below. At this height in the mountains the weather is quite unpredictable, and can differ markedly from the bland symbol on the weather forecast which covers an area of several thousand square kilometres. Fortunately we’d brought gear for most eventualities, so after lunch we togged up again and began the descent. As we did so, a light snow/hail shower came along, and for the first time on the walk I needed to put gloves on, as well as hat and hood on my coat. As we came lower the weather eased and became warmer, and eventually we were able to remove coats again.

Descending sounds easy, huh? Especially after ascending. Not so. The downhill is as difficult, if not more so, than the morning’s ascent. The only saving grace is that it was shorter – a mere 3.5 miles! The tracky is rocky, stony, and with some parts you literally have to climb down a rock face. One part is so hazardous that they have (gasp!) put up a barrier on the outside of the track! I know, unheard-of! Some of the descent was via a series of steps alongside the Anderson Cascades.

About one mile out from the hut, and still descending painfully, we had another issue to contend with: the sole on one of Nicola’s shoes decided to make a UDI¹ and try to form a new, breakaway shoe. This slowed her down considerably, but there was nothing to do except carry on and hope it stayed together until we got to the lodge, where repairs could be made. I was pretty much hobbling along myself by this point, with the accumulated stresses of coming downhill weighing on my legs, knees and feet. Finally we saw a sign… “that’d better not say ‘Hut 20 mins’” I said to myself, but luckily it read “Quintin Lodge 2 mins”, so we staggered the final few metres and collapsed in a heap.

One of the guides was there to greet us. “Are you coming on the walk to Sutherland Falls?” she brightly enquired. This is a side walk, 1½ hours’ duration, to see the world-famous² Sutherland Falls. We managed to convey our enthusiasm for this without resorting to swearing, and began the process of repair and recovery, involving hot showers, sending the offending boot to Doctor Ted³, expert in mending all kinds of equipment, laundering our clothes, then settling in the bar with a cold beer before dinner.

The rest of the evening followed the same routine as the previous days, and we chivvied the guide to make the presentation for the next day as quick as possible, as everyone by this stage was ready to hit the hay.

Day 4

This is the last day of walking, and thankfully it’s (a) mostly flat, and (b) mostly on well-maintained track. There are a few rocky sections, but much easier than Day 3. Before we set out, however, we had to recover Nicola’s boots, which had been magically fixed up overnight with glue, zip ties, and sticking plaster. They didn't look pretty, but they only had to make it through the day. 

All strapped up with some place to go

After the usual lunchmaking and breakfast routine, we packed ourselves up and set out at 7:30 because, although this is an easy day’s walk, it’s also the longest, at 13.5 miles. That’s a half-marathon. We stopped by the river at Giant’s Gate Falls for lunch. This is an area of outstanding natural beauty, and also an area of outstanding numbers of sandflies. We’d been advised to sit in the spray of the nearby waterfall as this would keep the sandflies away, but this was limited in success. We’d exhausted our supply of OFF! By this stage, so were reliant on another sandfly repellent, a “natural” one. “Natural” in this case means, “doesn’t work, naturally”. Give me science-based repellents every time.

The thing with sandfly bites is to not scratch them. They’re intensely itchy for a short while, but go down pretty quickly; unfortunately leaving a red mark which hangs around for days, if not weeks. I take antihistamines throughout the summer anyway for hay fever, so having antihistamine flowing through my veins helps to control them too.

Wherever humans stop and gather in the bush, so do weka, and as we were preparing for lunch there was a cry of “Oi! Come back!” from one of our group. Too late, alas, as an opportunistic weka had made off with an unattended sandwich. Consider it a learning experience.

After lunch we walked along the level track to Sandfly Point. Not a name which inspires confidence or joy, but at least there was a hut at the end, so we could close the door on them. Or we could, if people didn’t keep arriving, and politely holding the door open whilst the rest of their group caught up…to constant shouts of “SHUT THE DOOR!” from the rest of us in the hut.

The boat runs across Milford Sound to Mitre Point from here. As you arrive, you register on a whiteboard as the boat only holds 20, and it’s strictly first come first served. We were 18^th  and 19^th back, so got on the next sailing. We were also issued with a room key as the lodge where we stay this night is not an exclusive Ultimate Hikes one.

When we got off the boat at Mitre Point there was a bus to drive us up the hill, saving us a final 10 minute walk. Nicola’s boots had survived, but were now due to consigned to the “Boot Graveyard” where old boots go to die.

So that’s it. Captain’s log, stardate 20.12.27: Milford Track completed.

¹ Universal Declaration of Independence
² World-famous in New Zealand
³ Not a real doctor

Milford Track

Day 1

We packed our rucksacks, checked out of the hotel, and walked down into the CBD to meet the Ultimate Hikes bus at 9:00am. There we met with our guide team for our walk – Lara, Ted, Susan and Poppy. After dealing with an equipment emergency (a pair of shorts that refused to stay done up), we set out. The first stage of the Milford Track is actually getting to the start, mostly accomplished by bus. We stopped off at Te Anau for some lunch, and were entertained on the way by the driver giving us some history and “facts” about takahē (he got some of them wrong), and the region in general, before arriving at the pier at the end of Lake Te Anau. The final section of the journey to the start of the track is by boat along the lake. When we disembarked at the other end we sorted through the rucksacks to find ours, then set off on the short (one mile) section of the track to the first night’s accommodation, Glade Lodge. Already we’d been treated to some wildlife sightings – a pāpango on the lake with two ducklings, as well as numerous pūtangitangi from the bus – but we then went for a nature walk with one of the guides. We posed for out group photo, then split into four groups and headed off into the bush for an hour or so, with the guide (Susan, in our case) providing commentary on flora, fauna and fungi along the way. Naturally I asked lots of questions about what we were likely to see and where! We got to the Glade Burn, then turned back and headed into the lodge. We washed our clothes and dried them in the drying room, then headed for drinks, dinner, a briefing about the following day’s timings and weather forecast. We also introduced ourselves to the rest of the group, and our guides did likewise. Tomorrow, we begin walking proper.

Glade Lodge

Day 2

We were up what we thought was early, but turned out to be quite late compared to following days, at 7:00am. You can get up earlier but there’s not much point because that’s when the generator switches on, so there’s no hot water for showers before then. The day starts with lunchmaking, then breakfast. Packs need to be repacked to ensure that what you’re likely to need the most is near the top of the pack, and around 8:30 we set off for 10 miles that constitute Day 2. This is mostly over level ground, with a well-made track. There are a few rocky sections where you have to watch your footing but for the most part it’s easy walking, and we were able to look around ourselves and enjoy the scenery and the wildlife. The beginning of the track was across the river by bridge where we again saw pāpango. Shortly after was a side loop to a wetland area where we saw potato orchid and sundew – carnivorous plants. Along the way we saw the usual suspects – tūī, kererū, and pīwakawaka, and we were looking out for miromiro (tomtit) and tītitipounamu (rifleman). We saw the former and heard the latter. Towards the end there was a bit of a rocky uphill section, but we made it up OK and into the Pompolona Lodge. The evening followed the same format as before, and an early night as we had a big day ahead of us.

Let someone else use your camera and they'll focus on the river

Luging

Amazingly, we’ve been to Queenstown several times but have yet to go on the luge! Time to rectify this glaring error.

After getting back from paragliding, we pottered around Queenstown a bit looking for last-minute necessities, then had lunch at Prime, overlooking Lake Wakatipu. Then we (I) had an icecream at Patagonia (Nicola had had one in the morning whilst I was up in the air), bought tickets in town for the gondola and luge, and headed up the hill to the start of the gondola. This takes you up the hill to the lookout, so we looked out over Queenstown before taking another lift (uncovered, this time) to the start of the luge track.

The luge is a simple vehicle: it has a lever at the front, which you push forward to go (under the force of gravity) and pull back on to slow down. You also steer with it. First-timers are obliged to take the easy, blue track for their first run, in order to get the hang of it. The second time you can tackle the harder red run. The assistants ensure you know what you’re doing, and then you’re off! It’s like go-karting but without an engine. When you get to the bottom, you get out and go round again! Once is never enough. Also, the minimum number of rides you can buy is two…but you can buy as many as you like. We did the two rides, and congratulated ourselves on our adventurousness.

 

In the late afternoon, we assembled with our co-trampers for a briefing at Ultimate Hikes about what to bring, what to do, and general preparedness for the Milford Track. We collected rucksacks and linings, and took these back to the hotel. Then we went out for dinner at Bella Cucina, a nice little Italian restaurant where Nicola had gnocchi and lemon sorbet, whereas I had papardelle con frutti de mare and tiramisu. Yes, all mixed together. Now we’re back packing up for the trip and I thought I’d better commit this to blog because by the time I get back it will be a distant memory.

Tomorrow we go dark for five days. See you on the other side.

 

Coronet Peak Tandem

Queenstown calls itself “the adventure capital of New Zealand”, and the options for throwing yourself out of or from high places are many and varied: bungy jumping, skydiving, paragliding, hang-gliding are the main ones. I decided to throw myself off a mountain…but taking the precaution of having a man strapped to me, and a parachute strapped to him.

We met up in town at the designated time, 10:45, and were driven to the top of Coronet Peak, the highest point in the city of Queenstown. We’d originally planned for Nicola to come along as well on photography duty, but it turns out that coming down from the mountain by parachute is quicker than the winding road by bus, so she’d’ve missed my descent and landing anyway. So I abandoned her in Queenstown and went off with three other customers. As we stepped into the bus we were weighed, to make sure we hadn’t been lying on our booking (there’s a maximum weight restriction), and allocated a pilot. We picked up our pilots halfway up the road to Coronet Peak and introduced ourselves. I was with René from Czechia.

We arrived at our jumping-off point, and it’s exactly that: there’s no building, just a patch of gravel with an astroturf runway downhill. The pilots readied themselves and us, strapping us in to our gear, then their gear, then finally attaching themselves to us. It was a cloudy day so we were looking for gaps in the cloud to make our take-off. The first one went and fluffed it a little (she stopped running before she left the ground), so I was strictly enjoined not to do the same thing, and keep running! A gap opened in the cloud, the other pilot shouted “Go!”, and I started running downhill on the strip. Before I’d gone less than ten metres we were off the ground, but I kept running for comic effect.

And that’s it! We’re airborne! René was controlling the wing, and we did a bit of swooping and turning. René was also taking pictures, pointing his GoPro selfie stick in all directions and getting all the angles. After a while he asked if I’d like to take control of the wing, got me holding both the handles, and then I did some turns, pulling down and releasing on his commands to execute 90° turns left and right.

 

Me on the controls

As we approached the landing field René did some big swoops, rollercoaster-ride style, before coming in fast, almost clipping the top of the grass, then pulling up to a stall. “Feet down!” he shouted, and I did so, and was standing on the grass. We’d been airborne for around 15 minutes and, as expected, the bus was still not here. So we unclipped, unharnessed, and René packed away his wing. We looked at the photos and transferred them to my phone, for a fee. After a short while, Julia turned up in the bus and we rode back into Queenstown, again dropping the pilots off halfway down.

All jolly good fun, exciting, and not even a little bit scary! Oo-er! I’ll probably do it again next time we’re in Queenstown.

 

Queenstown 2020

We were up at sparrow fart to get on a plane down to Queenstown at 9:10. Thanks to our trip to Costa Rica earlier this year (was it really this year? It seems like a lifetime ago!), we’ve got plenty of airpoints and dollars, so our silver status entitled us to Koru Lounge entry. This includes breakfast, so we got there early to be able to take our time.

The flight down was a little bumpy, but we landed without fuss and took a cab to our hotel before heading out into town. We’re centrally located so walking is not a problem. We picked up a couple of things we wanted for our expedition in two days’ time on the Milford Track. We’ve got a couple of days in Queenstown before we set out on Christmas Eve.

The obvious spot for lunch in Queenstown is Fergburger. This has become an institution and usually entails a queue down the street and an hour-long wait for your food as they run a non-stop burger production from their kitchen. Nowadays, however, without the thousands of overseas tourists who usually throng the streets of Queenstown, we were able to march smartly up, order our burgers, and wait barely 10 minutes (roughly the time it takes to cook them) before they were ready. Queenstown is still busy, but not quite as manic as is usual at this time of year (and in fact the whole of the summer). We have taken the precaution of making sure we have bookings for dinner for all our nights here.

Look...no queues!

After lunch we took a walk through Queenstown Gardens, along the lake front and then through the forest and gardens, where people were playing frisbee golf on the specially-designed course.

In the evening, we went out to Botswana Butchery on the lake front. This is one of Queenstown’s top dining experiences, complete with waiters with poncy French accents. Fortunately they didn’t have French waiter attitude, but were very polite and efficient. We had cocktails followed by a steak (me) and hāpuku (Nicola). As their speciality is their meat, they have a regular menu, and a “little black book” updated daily with various cuts that they have only available on that day. I went for the Wakanui eye fillet, with green peppercorn sauce. The puddings were also up to scratch, I had chocolate and Nicola had a tarte tatin.

That about wrapped up Day 1. Tomorrow, I jump off a mountain.

All The Rage

Many moons ago, in 1BC (Before Covid), I booked tickets to see New Zealand comedy legend Urzila Carlson. For my international readership, on whom she may not yet have impinged, she is a South African-born kiwi comedian who is a regular on such shows as 7 Days and Have You Been Paying Attention?

The original gig was scheduled for July, but whilst we were out of lockdown by that stage, it had been rescheduled by then. Never mind, it was paid for, and as soon as the new date was announced (are you listening, Tapeface?¹), we put it in the diary. 

With a 7:30pm start, we had time for dinner. Unfortunately Loggy B’s seemed to be fully booked, so we took ourselves off to old fave Capitol instead, where we had oysters, bruschetta, duck, tuna, cheesecake and semifreddo. Not all in the same dish, obvs. They’re still on top of their game. It was very busy for a Wednesday night, but hey, Christmas, innit?

A quick trot up to the Michael Fowler Centre got us there in plenty of time for our places. As so often happens in Wellington, on the way I bumped into one of my colleagues from Zealandia in the street, and then when we got to MFC our former bar manager at The Old Bailey, where we quiz – she’s now working at Four Kings, which is part of the same hospitality group.

As the lights darkened, Urzila’s intro music played…Hungry Like The Wolf! So that put me in a good mood already. The show is your basic stand-up – her with a mic and no props. She started off telling us about her mother’s cat’s visit to the vet, what time to squeeze a cat’s anus, and wandered off into a diatribe about body parts and companies, how to kill a cat, and various other topics. She explained her rage against stupidity, with numerous examples, including the notorious avo squeezers in supermarkets, and how she exacts her revenge on them.

 The time flew past and she did a 90-minute set. Then it was time to go home. So we did.

 

¹ Tapeface was also to play a gig in Wellington. At the moment his Ticketbastard² status is “date announced soon”.

² You know who I mean.

Black Caps vs. West Indies

The West Indies cricket team are touring New Zealand at the moment. They’ve played three T20 matches in Auckland and Mount Maunganui; New Zealand won 2 of these and the third was abandoned after 2.2 overs. The format then switched to test matches, with one played in Hamilton at the beginning of December, where New Zealand won by an innings and 134 runs. The action moved to Wellington last Friday, and we headed down to the Basin Reserve for day one of the match.

The weather was sunny at first, but with a typical cool Wellington breeze blowing through the ground. We were relatively well sheltered in our seats, and out of the sun, unlike the folk on the grassy bank. West Indies won and elected to put New Zealand in to bat on a pitch and outfield that were still very green and wet from some serious rain the previous day. For a while around lunchtime the rain threatened to return, with some light drizzle, but the afternoon cleared up and became warm and sunny.

Batting was predictably tricky in the opening session, and there were some threes run which showed how slow the outfield was – balls that would normally carry for four being slowed down in the damp grass. By lunch they were at 82/3. The Windies were bowling noticeably slowly and only completed 23 overs in the first session. It looked like they had New Zealand on the ropes, but Henry Nicholls, who’d reached 2 before lunch, pushed on past 50 by teatime. The loss of only one further wicket, Nicholls’ 50, and the ground drying out meant the pendulum was swing back towards the Black Caps. In the final session they added 124 runs and Nicholls completed his century. They finished on 294/6, with Nicholls on 117. A good day’s batting for New Zealand, setting up the match.

The following day I was on duty at Zealandia, so I dropped Nicola off on the way, and she watched as New Zealand wrapped up their innings for a total of 460, and Nicholls reaching his highest ever score of 174. They then bowled the West Indies to 124/8 by the end of the day. It was pretty much a repeat of the first test, and on day three they cleaned up the remaining wickets, put the Windies back into bat, and had another crack at them. Again, as in the first test, they made a better showing in their second innings and were trailing by 85 at close, on 244/6. It didn’t take long for the Black Caps to polish the remaining wickets off on day four, and they won before lunch by an innings and12 runs.

The Black Caps win the series 2-0, ready to take on Pakistan next week. In the new ICC World Test Championship, New Zealand are now the No.1 test cricket side.

Paintvine

Paintvine is an activity company that provides people with an outlet for their creativity. And wine. Wine is an important part of it. They organise events where you drink wine , then paint a picture. Our evening was organised through the Friends of Te Papa, and took place inside the museum, after hours.

We started off with a glass of wine and some nibbles, and then learned about the picture that we were going to paint, from curator Rebecca Rice. This is one of many colour paintings done by John Gerrard Keulemans for Buller’s Birds of New Zealand – the first definitive book of New Zealand’s birds, published in the early 1870s. The first edition of the original books were produced to order – you had to pay in advance, as they were all hand-painted over lithograph prints. The bird selected for us is the kākāpō, New Zealand’s rare, flightless parrot.

Before beginning, Debbie Anderson (the artist in charge) gave us some helpful tips about how to draw, what colours to use, how to mix colours (we were using watercolours, but other events use different media), and generally make sure we knew what we were doing. No experience is necessary, and all the materials are provided for you. Importantly, they also clear up after you! We donned aprons and set about recreating Keulemans’ masterpiece.

 First, outline of the bird. We used a grid system to make sure we were getting the proportions right. 

Second, complete the details: 

Finally, apply paint.

 

This is my effort...

...and Nicola's interpretation

I know, I know. Indistinguishable from the original!

We took the paintings home and are now considering framing options.

 

 

Quiz World Cup

For the past few weeks, I’ve been competing in the Quiz World Cup run by Quizzing.tv. This is a competition run from the UK but involving, initially, 80 teams from 24 countries. Our team, Kiwiz, is run by our quizmaster at The Old Bailey, where we go quizzing weekly. This year, he invited me to join his team. It’s the only team from New Zealand, so I am, in a totally informal way, representing the country.

The quiz is run via Zoom, on the weekend, at a time agreed between the teams. The time differences make it a bit of a challenge for little ol’ New Zillund, especially when we compete against USA teams. The format includes individual rounds as well as team rounds. We’re sent the round subjects 20 minutes in advance, but they’re usually pretty vague (“Science” or “Lakes”, for example) so it’s not possible to try and Google answers before you begin…memorise all of Science in 20 minutes! Obviously, Googling or getting any other assistance during the quiz is a no-no – it was widely suspected that one competitor was using his phone, so we now have a rule that hands must be visible at all times!

The first round was a group stage – 16 groups of five teams each. The top two teams in each then graduated to the next group stage, so last 32. These were 8 groups with four teams. We came second in our first round group, so qualified for the next stage (losers go into a series of “rosette” competitions so final rankings can be determined). Some of these teams contain the best quizzers from their countries: in round 2 we found ourselves up against Scotland B, which includes Anne Hegerty (The Governess from The Chase). We lost by one point against them so picked up a bonus point there. We won the rest of our matches, including against Quiz Van Der Rohe, a German team which includes one of the German Chasers known as The Quiz Volcano from their version of The Chase,  Gefragt – Gejagt. So one-all on Chasers faced! Not bad, eh?

We’re now in the final 16, which is quite an achievement in itself. We’ll be playing another American team, The Zoomtown Rats, who apparently include America’s best quizzer (he’s won over $1m on Jeopardy!, and also is ranked #2 in the world), this weekend. Wish us luck!

Rice Salad

 OK, so I had a go at the rice salad, and instead of just chucking things in to see if that's about right, I actually measured out the ingredients first. This tasted OK, so follow it, but feel free to add more or less ingredients as you see fit. The 120g measurement for mung bean sprouts is because I bought a 120g packet. I actually made half these quantities but have doubled up for convenience. 

Feeds 4 (ish)

300g rice (I used basmati, but try brown if you prefer)
1 tbsp curry powder
2 tbsp cider vinegar
120g mung bean sprouts
1 green pepper, diced
150g raisins
150g peanuts

1 tbsp poppy seeds
1 tbsp brown sugar
salt and pepper

Cook the rice with the curry powder and vinegar. Drain and cool the rice, then add the rest of the ingredients and mix together. 

For the hippies amongst my readership (are there any?), this is vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free.

Enjoy!

 

Nick’s Head Station

Our final excursion was to Nick’s Head Station, a mixed sheep and horticulture farm formed from the amalgamation of three properties, one of which incorporates Young Nick’s Head, named for the seaman who first sighted land from HMS Endeavour. The Māori name is Te Kuri o Pāoa (the dog of Pāoa), which it is said to resemble. It was the site of the landing place of two waka – one commanded by Pāoa – which carried Māori settlers to Poverty Bay around 1350CE.

We started off in the office, where farm manager Kim Dodgshun told us about the history of the station, the background to the 2002 purchase, and the subsequent conservation, reforestation and predator control. The farm employs 22 staff (compared to just three at the neighbouring farm) to ensure that not only is the farm well-managed, but all aspects of conservation and care are undertaken.

The owner has cleared the area of predators, added a predator-proof fence, and introduced endemic species such as tuatara and wētā. Using solar-powered speakers to imitate bird calls, tākapu, tītī and other sea birds have been tempted to recolonise the cliffs and establish new colonies there.

We ate lunch alfresco in the substantial wetland, an area created by Nelson Byrd Woltz Landscape Architects. Afterwards we walked to the beach, seeing many New Zealand species on the way: pūtangitangi, poaka, weweia, and kakīānau in the wetland, and tūturiwhatu on the beach. These are only possible because of the protection given to this habitat. My photography in this area was not an unbridled success, as I didn’t have my 500mm lens with me, but we were able to identify many species.

Afterwards we boarded the bus which took us back to the hotel. We picked up our car and drove down to Napier on a Sunday afternoon road thankfully clear of logging trucks, to arrive in time for dinner.

On The Marae

Our first trip out this morning was to Te Ohako marae. We arrived and formed up into two groups – women enter the marae first, followed by the men. We took our seats in the designated areas and were welcomed onto the marae with formal speeches, and then singing, and finally a hongi. Then we listened to Stan Pardoe, a prominent figure and historian in the Turanganui-a-Kiwa community, as he told us about the history of the area and what it was like growing up in the mid-century for Māori in and around Tairāwhiti. We also heard from some of the others, including a bunch of young people who had recently completed a course being run by the marae to train them for farm work, and were going on to work on nearby agriculture in various roles. Afterwards we finished the visit with the obligatory morning tea.

The next part of the morning was a visit to the Toko Toru Tapu church in Manutuke. This is one of the oldest churches in New Zealand, originally established by William Williams (original names weren’t a big thing in the 19^th century) and is in fact the fourth church to be built near this site – the others having been lost to storm, fire and disrepair. The fourth time, in 1913, they decided to build in something other than wood – they used bricks and mortar instead. The latest church was again in disrepair when the local community decided something must be done, and it has since been repaired, restored, and earthquake-strengthened (using fibreglass rods from Pultron, natch, for an invisible finish). The church is unusual as it contains Māori carvings throughout. Williams originally objected to using Māori symbolism in the church because, well, they can sometimes be a bit rude for churchy folk, so the carver, Rahuruhi Rukupō, changed the style but subtly worked in cryptic meanings to the carvings which went way over the head of the local missionaries. All this was explained by the architect who had overseen the restoration, James Blackburne, who had also been on the marae with us.

At midday we boarded the bus again for a visit to Eastwoodhill Arboretum, a project started in the 1950s by William Douglas Cook. In the 1950s he was mightily concerned about global nuclear war, and envisioned Eastwoodhill as a place to preserve Northern hemisphere species which could be destroyed by a nuclear holocaust. Since then the focus of the arboretum has changed, and moved away from the rather haphazard plantings to establish a 150 year plan to ensure the survival of both native and exotic species.

We had lunch at the café, and were very much taken with the rice salad, so I asked for the recipe. I haven’t worked out quantities yet, but it contains:

Brown rice
Curry powder
Cider vinegar
Brown sugar
Poppy seeds
Peanuts
Currants
Bean shoots
Green pepper

So I’m going to work on that and see if I can replicate it.

After lunch we took a guided tour with Dan Taylor, one of the curators, who explained about the vision of the arboretum and some of the species that were in it. We took in the existing Tree Cathedral as well as viewing the site of the new one, planted five years ago, which has the same dimensions as Westminster cathedral.

The existing tree cathedral...

...and the new one

But we’re not done yet! The final visit of the day was to the house of Dame Bronwen and Peter Holdsworth, founders of Pultron amongst other things, for afternoon tea (pink bubbles) and cake, in their garden.

Whew! Quite a busy day! We got back to the hotel with little time for a turn-around to get back out for dinner at one of Gisborne’s eateries…but none of us were particularly hungry, so settled for a mix of starters and one main course (me!) – snapper, which was overcooked and disappointing. Ah well, can’t win them all. And so to bed.

More Gisborne

The next day we took ourselves off to Toihoukura, School of Māori Art and Design, which is just up the road. We arrived by 10:00 and had a look at the art in the gallery – the second year students’ end-of-year exhibition – before taking a seat and having a talk given by the principal lecturer, Derek Lardelli. He explained the principles of the school, why it is important, and how It is attracting people from all around New Zealand to study and practice modern Māori art. Some of it is using traditional methods and materials, but there is also a lot pieces using more modern techniques and ideas, including digital technology. Some of the students were also present so were able to talk to us about their particular artworks and inspiration. We bought a piece that was a combination of traditional and modern.

Afterwards, we had lunch in a café in Gisborne before walking to our next point of interest, the Tairāwhiti Museum. There we explored the exhibitions and were led on a guided tour, which included the next-door ‘C’Company Memorial House. This is a memorial to the members of ‘C’ Company of the ANZAC, the Māori Battalion, in two world wars, as well as continued service in Malaya, Vietnam, and Afghanistan. This section of the tour was delivered by a former officer who was able to bring to life the stories of the Māori in Gallipoli and also in WW2, particularly the exploits of Haane Manahi. We then switched guides and went with one of the curators of the museum, who gave us some insights into the current collection and efforts to repatriate taonga Māori currently held by overseas museums, particularly in the UK and Germany; she also took us underground to the archives to show us some artworks and other objects not currently on display.

Our next port of call was a visit to a Jack Richards’ house, gallery and garden in Okitu. The gardens are extensive and we explored them for about an hour before returning to the house and admiring the artwork on display. We’d already seen some of it at Tairāwhiti Museum where it is on loan at the moment.

Our return journey included a visit to the lookout up the top of Titirangi Hill, where Captain Cook first came ashore in New Zealand. We took pictures of Young Nick’s Head, the headland opposite named after the Endeavour’s surgeon’s loblolly boy, Nick Young…who was young (12) at the time. He was in the crow’s nest and first to sight land which turned out to be New Zealand.

In the evening we went for dinner at the Marina Restaurant, on the banks of the Waimatā river. After starting with shared platters of Gisborne produce (meats, avocados, asparagus etc.) there were two options for main - beef fillet or snapper, not dissimilar to last night’s. As we were a large group of 40+, they’d come up with a novel arrangement to serve it: alternating meat and fish, and you had to negotiate with your partner or neighbour about who got what! The same applied to the dessert – a kiwifruit & coconut concoction or chocolate panna cotta. A bit odd. Nevertheless, it was all quite well-cooked and tasty.

Gisborne

The Friends of Te Papa is an organisation devoted to providing artworks and other support to the Museum of New Zealand Te Papa Tongarewa (usually shortened to Te Papa). Among their many activities are organised trips to the provinces to talk to their regional museums and cultural groups, as it is a museum for all of New Zealand, not just Wellington. They organised a trip to Gisborne, which we signed up for.

Gisborne is quite a way from Wellington, and many of the group were flying there. We decided, however, to drive, and stayed the first night in Napier.  After a dinner at Napier’s premier Indian restaurant, Indigo, we headed up to Gisborne the following day. We’d booked the night at the Emerald Hotel, in order to be there ready and early for the first item on the agenda at 10:00 on Thursday.

This was a visit to Pultron, a manufacturer of FGRP (that’s fibre glass reinforced plastic to you), an unlikely candidate for us, but an important employer in the area and also with an international presence. They make the rods that are the key component of all-enclosed trampolines, amongst other things. We learned more than we could ever possibly want to about the process and uses of FGRP. No pictures, as we had to sign non-disclosure and secrecy agreements about it to ensure we weren’t spying for their competitors.

In the evening we went to dinner at the Bushmere Arms, a country garden, restaurant and function venue, run by Robin Pierson who singlehandedly maintains the gardens and chefs the kitchen. We toured the gardens which included a lot of produce, which would end up on our plates. Hors d’oeuvres were provided, then dinner was a choice of beef fillet or hāpuku (I had the beef, Nicola had the fish), both very good.

After dinner we were bussed back to our hotel. Tomorrow morning: Art and museums.

Wallburger

On Sunday I completed another Zealandia By Day tour at 1000. The lucky punters on this particular trip got the bonus tour, and I didn’t finish until 1245.  Overrunning on a tour is fine so long as you check with your group beforehand that they’re not under any time pressure, and are happy to go longer…unlike the cruise ship tours I was doing last summer, where the golden rule is to be back at the Visitor Centre in time for their bus.

As it was, we’d had a great tour with lots of good sightings, but I was hungry! I checked the Burger Wellington app for venues in the CBD to get my burger fix, and decided on Coco’s Bar & Grill. Open for lunch and dinner, it said, so I parked up, and headed to Willeston Street, to find out that it is open for lunch and dinner, except Sundays. “Bah! No matter, I’ll go to Concrete instead” I said to myself. I got to their door (they’re up Cable Car Lane, and upstairs) and it didn’t look particularly open, but I pushed against the door and it opened, so I went upstairs. The next door was locked, however, and I’ve a feeling the one downstairs should have been too, as I had to search around and find the door release to let myself out. Two down, I checked the app again, and looked up Rosie’s Red-Hot Cantina & Taco Joint. This was in Queen’s Wharf, on the dockside, so I figured there was a pretty good chance of them being open. And lo and behold, they were!

If you’ve not heard of Rosie’s, and you live in Wellington, this is probably because they’ve only just opened – on the site previously occupied by Munchen, and before that Chicago Sports Bar. They’re so new, in fact, that when I scanned the QR code for the Covid tracer app, the name still came up as Munchen. 

Their Burger Wellington offering is the Wallburger, and it’s described like this: Smoked and smashed brisket patty with pepper jack cheese, dill pickles, chipotle mayo and curtido cabbage relish in a Brezelmanina potato bun with chilli con queso fries and birria dip. The Garage Project beer match was once again Garagista, so I again had that.

It looks like this: 

That is a substantial burger! The fries were smothered in aioli and chilli, so were more suitable for eating with a fork, but the burger was pick-up-able. Unfortunately the bun wasn’t of the most robust construction, and as I was eating it, it stared to drift apart like a plate tectonic. This wasn’t helped by the burger – I don’t think the brisket had been cooked long enough to get to that fall-apart consistency which is usually the aim, and it was still a bit chewy. The cheese, relish and pickles, however, were good. I feel that this burger was let down in the delivery, and the cooking of the brisket – the elements were all here to make this a great burger. The fries in themselves would probably make a good meal – I couldn’t finish them. I’m scoring it a disappointing 6/10.

Pao Bao

On Friday I had a Zealandia By Day tour booked. We’re coming in to the long weekend for Labour Day in New Zealand, so the Tours Team had opened up some of the ZBD tours to paid guides in order to meet the expected demand. I booked myself in to take the 1000 tours for Friday, Sunday and Monday.

After the tour was over, I drove into town in search of burgers. Mr Go’s is an Asian street-food type place on Taranaki Street, and the food there has always been tasty. I thought I’d give their burger a go (ha-ha, do you see what I did there? 😉 ).

Burger Wellington describe the Pao Bao like this: Kung Pao chicken with Shoots NZ microgreen slaw, pink pickled onion, red pepper and Sichuan mayonnaise in a housemade steamed bao with skin-on shoestring fries. The Garage Project beer match is Noon Juice, one of the new brews specially created for Burger Wellington this year; and one I’ve had before, and found to be thoroughly acceptable, so I opted for it again.

It looks like this:

As you can see, a bit unwieldy. Also, being a bao bun, I find that these can be a bit doughy, so I decided to remove the lid and use cutlery to tackle this burger instead. The Kung Pau chicken was sweet, spicy and tasty, and the fries crisp. As I expected, it was a little bit bready and I didn’t finish the bun. I did finish the fries though, because they were good. Overall, another good burger, and I’m scoring it 8/10.

 

The Forager

I had another training session shadowing a night tour on Thursday, so decided to get a burger on my way to Zealandia. I didn’t really want to stop off in the CBD at the height of rush hour, so I decided to detour through Newtown and try the burger from Mediterarranean Food Trattoria & Deli.

I’ve not been to MFT&D for donkeys years. Last time we went, it was called Mediterranean Food Warehouse, and was largely what it said on the tin, with a small café serving pizza and cabinet food on the side. But times change, and it is now mostly a pizzeria and restaurant with a small sideline in selling Mediterranean foods. I managed to park on Constable Street close by, and went in to sample their burger. It’s called The Forager, and Burger Wellington describes it like this: Black Angus beef patty with truffled prosciutto cotto ham, Taleggio cheese, lollo lettuce, balsamic borettane pickled onion and locally foraged porcini mushrooms in an Altamura sourdough bread bun, with Van der Rose potato wedges.

It looked like this:

It’s a pretty hefty burger, but I managed to squash it together and pick it up. Fortunately there wasn’t too much slippage with all those ingredients listed, and the prosciutto and cheese gave it a sweet saltiness, with an additional tang added by the onions. The mushrooms were a bit lost at the bottom and I couldn’t really detect their flavour much. The wedges weren’t particularly crispy, which was a disappointment, but overall the burger wasn’t bad. The Garage Project beer match was an old favourite, Garagista, but as I was on my way to work I went with Adam’s Ale instead. I’m scoring this burger a 7/10.

The night tour was pretty cool – two kiwi and a ruru! Also a gecko, and a Cook Strait giant wētā. All in all a successful evening.

The Tongue Twister

We were in town today so decided to try a burger from Olive on Cuba Street. They’re a reliable café-style eatery, with a menu that is usually quite vegetarian-heavy, but they’ve decided to go big on the meat burger this year with The Tongue Twister.

It’s described on the Burger Wellington page like this: Beef patty with tongue bacon, battered pickle, green peppercorn BBQ sauce, smoked cheddar, lettuce and mayonnaise in an Arobake horopito brioche bun, with prawn and soy crackers and seaweed salt. The Garage Project beer match is Pickle beer. This has the misfortune to be a sour beer, a style I’m not keen on, so I picked a Parrotdog Pandemonium instead. Also, as there are no chips with this burger, I ordered some.

It looks like this:

The first thing that happened was the lid and burger slid off the base as the waiter put it on the table. Clearly unstable, I thought, as I reassembled the burger, and proceeded to attack it with knife and fork instead.

The key feature of this burger is the tongue bacon, and there were two generous slices of this topping the patty. Other than that, the other elements of the burger were all present. Personally I’d have left out the lettuce, or at least shredded it to make it a bit more manageable, but that’s just my preference. The bread-to-burger ratio was more to the bread side, and I left half of the top uneaten. The prawn crackers seemed to be a bit of an afterthought, and didn’t really complement the burger in any way, so I’m not sure why they were there. Just serve your burgers with chips, people! (Unless you’re deliberately doing an Asian-style bao burger or something.) The patty itself was flavourful and well cooked, and overall I thought this was a good burger. I scored it an 8/10.

Gochu

Another day, another burger dictated by timing and accessibility. I was due to do another night tour shadowing at Zealandia as part of my training, so decided to get an early burger in Miramar before heading to Karori. The venue I selected was Gasworks, as they are (a) open in the evening, and (b) on the way. Nicola came with me and walked back home afterwards.

Gasworks’ burger is called Gochu, and is described like this: Beef patty with gochujang sauce, pickles, cheddar, Swiss, jalapeño cheese, Woody's Free Range Farm pastrami, caramelised onions and ketchup in a Brezelmania potato bun, with fried daikon pickles.

It looked like this:

So what did I think of it? Well, there was a nice spiciness about the gochujang sauce, and it was easily manhandled without falling apart. And whilst all the trimmings were there (fried pickles is a theme that seems to be running this year), the central element was a let-down: the patty itself was flavourless. I don’t know what beef they were using, but they need to find something better. Overall, a disappointing effort. I scored it 5/10.

Opa!

My best-laid plans have been ganging aglay like nobody’s business recently! Burger opportunities are being thwarted at every turn.

On Saturday, I was shadowing a Zealandia Twilight Tour. It ended later than I anticipated, so my plan to pick up a burger at Kelburn Village Pub was denied, as their kitchen shuts at 9pm, and we didn’t get out until quarter past. Oh, well, no problem, I’ll get one tomorrow…

On Sunday, KIWIZ, the quiz team I have been participating in the World Cup with, were due to play a team from California, Cogito Ergo Mum. Due to time differences and people needing to get to work, the time we agreed was 2:00 am UK time (all timings are run from the UK, as the organisers are UK-based) i.e. 2:00 pm Sunday afternoon for us, and 7:00 pm Saturday for our opposition. So far, so good…but when the notifications came through, however, they all said 1:00 am UK time. “Oh, that’s because they’re changing to Summer Time” someone said – but that doesn’t happen until this weekend. At this point I said I wouldn’t be able to make it, as I had a morning shift at Zealandia.

That’s when the trouble really started. As I was coming off shift, I checked my phone. The time had now been switched back to 2:00 pm, but one of our team members couldn’t make it, so I said I could step in and rushed back home, burgerless. My plan had been to stop in town and pick one up along the way. As it was, I had no time.

I got home, checked in again, and found that they were back up to four people, so didn’t need me after all! So I had no quiz, no burger, and was generally discombobulated. Harrumph!

On Monday night, I was due back at Zealandia for After Hours Valley Emergency training. This started at 6:30 pm, so this time I was finally able to stop at Kelburn Village pub and try their burger. It’s called Opa! and sounds like this: Moroccan-spiced chicken with slaw and Elysian tzatziki in an Arobake beetroot bun, with beer-battered onion rings and polenta fries.

And here’s how it looked: 

Now I’m not normally a big fan of polenta (who is?), but the deep-fried “chips” weren’t bad. The burger was OK, a little on the small side, and the chicken agreeably spicy. Bun integrity was good, and overall the whole meal was…unexceptional. It did the job, and what it said on the tin, but no-one’s going to be writing home about what a great culinary experience they’ve just had. It is, after all, pub grub. As I was going straight on to work I went without the Garage Project beer match, which would have been Noon Juice. Instead, I had cranberry juice. I scored the burger 6/10.

Over the coming week I’ve got more training to do, so my burger choices might be dictated by convenience and speed rather than what looks the best. Hopefully some of them will be good.